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Playing Professional Cricket with MS

Playing Professional Cricket with MS

Power Of Women Podcast with Jemma Barsby explores what it takes to compete at elite level while living with multiple sclerosis.

Diagnosed at 19, Jemma has built a professional cricket career without missing a game. In this episode, she speaks openly about managing fatigue, adapting preparation, navigating anti-doping protocols, and advocating for MS awareness.

This is a conversation about leadership in women’s sport, the realities of pay disparity, and the discipline required to build a career that works with your body rather than against it.

 

➡️You’ll Hear :

The moment Jemma realised cricket was her life

The pay gap realities in professional women’s cricket

What MS changed – and what it didn’t

Heat management, recovery and pre-cooling strategies

Drug testing and navigating athlete medical protocols

Why vulnerability builds respect, not weakness.

 

Jemma is raising $6 million to fund Australian MS clinical trials though her Whack MS for 6 campaign.

You can donate to Jemma’s cause here:
👉https://www.mycause.com.au/page/385730/whack-ms-for-6

📖 Read the full transcript of this conversation here.

DI GILLETT [Host] (00:00)

doing stats. how are you thinking of launching? You’ve just got three or four points you want to make.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (00:09)

Well yeah, I pretty much just went off your examples. So the three, yep, the three examples,

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (00:13)

Yeah, perfect. Perfect, Yep.

 

And then what I’ll do is come in and introduce the podcast. And then when I come, when I actually throw and say, you know, welcome to the welcome to the podcast, Jemma, then then we’ll start the the Q &A. One question that I didn’t have in the run sheet that I’d love to ask you and probably should have put in is ⁓ professional athletes are held to

 

know, high standard on what you’re allowed to consume and those sorts of things. Can I ask you about that in relation to managing MS and is that a juggling act? Is that something I can touch on?

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (00:57)

Yeah, that’s fine. Yeah. That’s the end. wish you all.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (01:01)

Because I mean, if we think about, God, it was 1986 that we only turned around and said PRP is blood doping and hey, it’s got major advantages. So I’m sure it’s a general interest question just in terms of how you manage that. beautiful, beautiful. Well, I’m in your hands. You can fire away whenever you’re ready and I’ll…

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (01:21)

Yeah, yeah, no, easy done.

 

You

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (01:31)

I’ll follow in after you.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (01:33)

Yep, sounds good.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (01:35)

Okay.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (01:36)

I ⁓ women when I feel heard and respected. I believe that everyone has a voice. ⁓ My purpose in life is to help people in the sporting arena and people living with MS.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (01:57)

Thanks, Jemma. Now you’ve got a puppy dog in the background.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (02:01)

Yeah, of course she just went off then,

 

so… Do you need me to redo them?

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (02:05)

That’s all right.

 

No, no, no, no, we’ve got we’ve got enough of a gap and I’ll do mine. What does ambition really demand over the long term? I’m Di Gillett and this is the Power of Women podcast. And what I love about this platform is the opportunity to showcase and celebrate the strength, resilience and achievements of women from all walks of life.

 

And through revealing lived experience, it becomes a chorus of wisdom that makes sure women are seen just not for what we do, but for who we are. And today’s conversation is one of those conversations that sits right at the intersection of performance, ambition, and endurance. My guest is a leader in Australian, let me do that piece again, Daryl. My guest is a leader in Australian women’s cricket.

 

performing at an elite level in a sport that continues to fight for parity while asking its athletes to deliver excellence. Her name is Jemma Barsby. Jemma’s career is a study in endurance, physical, mental, and professional, and it’s shaped further by the realities of living and competing with MS, multiple sclerosis. This is a conversation about what it takes to show up.

 

week after week at the highest level. And she’s already a winner in my book, Jemma Barsby, Welcome to the Power of Women podcast.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (03:40)

Thank you, thanks for having me. What an intro.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (03:43)

Jemma, what was the inspiration behind the decision to play cricket and why cricket?

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (03:53)

Yeah, it’s a good question. I asked this quite a lot. I was very fortunate to grow up in a cricketing family. my dad, Trevor Barsby, played cricket for Queensland for quite a number of years. And he was a part of the first shield win for Queensland, which was now 30 years ago, which is pretty incredible. So I think it was just from being around his games and just from a young age, was a picture of me picking up a

 

instead of getting a photo with dad for his last game, it me going for the cricket ball and just had the eyes for it. So was pretty much since I could walk that I kind of had… ⁓

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (04:29)

There’s

 

the competitive streak right out the gate.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (04:34)

Yeah, going for

 

the ball, not wanting a photo or whatnot, just going straight for that ball to get it into my hands. yeah, it was kind of like pretty, yeah, pretty, like I said, pretty much since I could walk, there was definitely no pressure from mom or dad to go down that path of cricket. And they wanted me just to fall in love for it for my own reasons. And yeah, I just naturally did that from going from backyard cricket to starting at the local club in Brisbane.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (04:37)

Yeah.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (05:02)

playing under sevens with the boys and then following that through to under 17s and then heading over to the women’s side of things from there. So yeah, I was pretty much from the get-go, got straight into cricket.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (05:10)

If.

 

Wow, so how old were you literally when you picked up that ball?

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (05:20)

or I was this white haired little girl, I probably maybe like three maybe? Yeah, so I was just like, yeah it was pretty much, yeah, probably I could pretty much walk.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (05:28)

Yeah, wow.

 

And are you an

 

only child or have you got siblings?

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (05:36)

I’ve got an older brother and a younger sister. So my brother played a couple of games for Queensland as well. And ⁓ my sister, I think, one season, but says she never played cricket. So she’s the real girly girl in the family. ⁓

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (05:52)

There you have it. So who was the inspiration? Was it dad or was it more than that?

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (05:59)

⁓ yeah, when I always get asked this question, I always like, I always try and I guess think of someone, but I probably necessarily didn’t really have anyone, but obviously, yeah, it was great to see. Yeah. Yes. I probably, yeah, I probably should say it was dad and just, guess what he was able to achieve during his career and even how he went about his, ⁓ style of batting is very aggressive. ⁓ everyone that I spoke speak to.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (06:08)

You know he’s listening. You know he’s hanging out for you to say it’s him.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (06:24)

about the way when he played his cootie, was like, he wasn’t there to muck around, he’s got on with his business. So yeah, I loved that about the way dad went about it. And I think that’s where I probably enjoyed watching the likes of Matthew Hayden, Adam Gilchrist go about the way they batted because they were very aggressive and took the game on too. So they were probably the people growing up that I liked to watch playing.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (06:49)

Yeah, and were they your heroes?

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (06:52)

⁓ I wouldn’t necessarily say heroes, but I did enjoy watching the way they went about it. I ⁓ probably didn’t really have any heroes growing up. I kind of just liked to watch the game for what it was and just kind of went about it my own way, ⁓ the way of playing. So yeah, wouldn’t say I necessarily had any heroes growing up.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (07:15)

Outside of cricket, were there others that you looked to on the sporting arena though?

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (07:22)

⁓ outside of cricket, ⁓ not necessarily. did enjoy just, think, ⁓ probably just like our backyard career with my brother. And we had a few of his mates, ⁓ stay with us over the years growing up because I was from the country. So when they were playing state cricket, ⁓ they’d come down for competitions and stay with us. So it kind of then, guess that competition of playing with guys three years older than me and my brother that it kind of, ⁓ built that resilience into me of, ⁓

 

not being able to get them out or they’d get me out first ball and then go and crying so to mom and dad so it taught me a lot of lessons growing up too so yeah was good fun.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (07:52)

Yeah.

 

I too grew up with Brothers One in particular who was highly competitive and achieved on the sporting stage and all of my resilience with a capital R came from that childhood and the experiences of really survival. So I can get it.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (08:16)

You

 

Yes, yes. Yeah, I can, yeah, it

 

helped me. Yeah, it helped me in my underage with the boys as well, because obviously myself and then I was very fortunate to have another girl playing my side from pretty much all the underage from up to 17s where we play with the guys. you kind of obviously once you got to the under 17s with them, they obviously grew and started having their growth spurts and becoming into a man. So they started to grow and I stayed the same height. So it was definitely.

 

good learning curve and built that resilience up as well playing against them and the under 17s where I was just getting bounced the whole time while was batting but yeah it was cool.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (08:54)

Yeah.

 

So was

 

there a female league at that stage under 17 or was playing with the boys your only option?

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (09:09)

Um, yeah, probably back with, yeah, when I was in and around there, was mainly just playing with the boys. Like that was obviously women’s cricket, but I was still, um, quite young to be playing women’s cricket. So they didn’t really have any actual women’s sides or girls sides growing up. So yeah, it was just myself and another girl playing yet all underage. So it’s only been probably the last, or maybe 10 years that there has started to be an all girls teams coming through. So yeah, that’s exciting that they are then.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (09:21)

Mm.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (09:39)

having full girls teams and actually playing against the guys still as well.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (09:39)

Mmm.

 

So were there mentors for you as you made that transition ⁓ from a 17 year old into starting to pursue this endeavour?

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (09:57)

Yeah, definitely. think the one that stands out for me is, it was obviously a really crucial time for me. I used to bowl medium pace, but I obviously stopped growing and quite short. a gentleman called Paul Pink, which unfortunately he’s not with us anymore, but he, I remember he was a selector for the Queensland Fire, which is the state women’s side. And he pulled me aside and was like, if you want to get any further with your cricket, I think you should.

 

go to ⁓ spin and he took me down to the nets for a few sessions and taught me how to spin bowling and yeah, have massive credit to him to be able to, I guess, have that effort to take me down to the nets to teach me a whole new skill and ⁓ then to, I guess, do that for probably six months and then get picked in the Queensland side. Yeah, forever thankful for him for his time and effort to, I guess, pursue that opportunity for me.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (10:54)

And for you, do you see the role of mentor being an important role that you’re gonna play for the generation coming in behind you?

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (11:04)

Yeah, absolutely. And I would be the first to say that I forget about doing that sometimes too, or I forget that I am a role model to the younger ones coming up. And it’s not until they say a couple of things or when we do our culture sessions at the start of the year. And I remember one of them goes, yeah, I look up to you and I was like, kind of just, I guess, stopped me in my tracks. I was like, yeah, right. Like I forget that, yes, they’re my teammates, but they also look up to me and ⁓

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (11:20)

Mmm.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (11:33)

watch everything that I do, how I train, how I go about it, even in and around games. So yeah, it’s pretty surreal still and getting used to that, but ⁓ I find I’m very fortunate that I’ve seen it from being non-professional to guess for me being a hobby to now being somewhat professional. ⁓ It’s been pretty cool and I definitely would not change that at all.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (11:42)

Mmm.

 

Yeah. And you just mentioned somewhat professional. I mean, what’s that step between somewhat professional and your pure focus?

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (12:11)

Yeah, so I do do cricket full time. Well, ⁓ sorry, not necessarily full time, but it is my job. But we’re classified as point eight. So we’re not officially full time. Yeah, it’s really silly. Very silly. But ⁓ yeah, so that classifies us as not. Yeah.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (12:15)

Yeah.

 

Point eight, where are you in life? Point eight, that’s, I mean, that’s

 

a little bit grating. How does that land?

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (12:35)

Yeah, it’s annoying. Like, and that’s probably the thing that we’ve, I guess, fought for, for number of years. Like, yes, it’s very good that the women’s pay has gone up over the years and that we are like, that I am able to do this now solely. But then when you compare it to the men and where they’re at, we still have that massive gap, even at the, the way up to the Aussie level. Like say, for instance, I don’t know, like, but the Aussie captain is on millions of dollars where the Aussie captain at the women’s sides.

 

on maybe a couple hundred thousand, like that difference is still huge and that goes, flows all the way down. So it’s, I guess it’s respecting, yes, our position has gone up and it’s got better, but we still also have a long way to go as well. And we need to continue to push those barriers down to make it as equal as we can.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (13:24)

Can I ask, is it ⁓ realistic and is it possible to survive as a ⁓ professional cricketer with, in the absence of significant sponsorship deals in place or is it only through the marriage of that and the remuneration that you can truly make a fist of it?

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (13:47)

I think it depends on this with crickets, obviously cricket in general is very confusing as a sport, but then you add contracts on that as well. And there’s two different contracts. So there’s obviously the state based one, which is all year round. And then you got the WVBL one, which is you play that for two months. So there’s two contracts. So yeah. So if you have two contracts, would say, yes, you’re able to live on that. ⁓

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (14:07)

You got a couple of jobs. Yeah. Yeah.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (14:17)

depending obviously how good you are because the contracting ⁓ scale is quite high. But then some people in our state side only have the state contract so they’re then quite well below other players. So it’s them trying to, guess, manage and negotiate but that’s mainly a lot of the younger girls. So they’re probably still fortunate that they’re living at home and have that access. So I think we’ve only got one girl who’s a rookie which is then even lower but she’s, well she had just completed school so.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (14:22)

Mmm.

 

Mmm.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (14:47)

⁓ Yeah, the variance is still quite high even within the state system.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (14:53)

Yeah. So did seeing women play at a high level spur you on or was it regardless of seeing that and being able to follow that yourself?

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (15:06)

Yeah, was probably regardless of that, to be honest, didn’t really growing up, I didn’t really know, or we didn’t have the access to what we do now of watching women’s cricket. I didn’t really know the pathways or where like, yeah, that there was really an Australian side. Like it was kind of, wasn’t until I got older ⁓ that then I started to realize that there is a slight little pathway into negotiate down that path. So yeah, obviously growing up, I didn’t really know that women played.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (15:09)

Mmm.

 

Mmm.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (15:36)

create for Australia or for the state. yeah, I was kind of just doing it for the love of it to begin with. then that’s probably, yeah, once I got older, realized that it is a path that you could could go down.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (15:43)

Mm.

 

So what was that tipping point Jemma? What was the tipping point of playing it out of love versus realising this could seriously become your full-time focus?

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (16:00)

Yeah, well, I was very fortunate. I debuted for Queensland at the age of 15, so I was still in school at that time. So I was juggling. remember I was, it was, we used to play T20 on the Friday afternoon and then play a one day, a Saturday and then play T20 on Sunday morning. So I’d go to school for up until lunchtime on the Friday and then go play cricket ⁓ pretty much Friday afternoon, Saturday, Sunday morning, have the pretty much Sunday morning off.

 

I mean, sorry, Sunday afternoon off and then go back to school Monday. So it probably wasn’t until ⁓ maybe even a few years down the track out of school when it actually started to, the pay started to increase and whatnot that I could actually do that as a full-time job. Cause I used to, ⁓ I love my coffee. I used to work in a cafe. So I’d go in between the two of cricket training and working at a cafe. And it’s probably only been maybe the last.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (16:32)

Mm.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (16:56)

Probably four years that I have like actually not worked in a cafe and just done this so it’s probably I’ve been within the last four years to be honest

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (17:00)

you

 

Yeah, wow. So from school picking up the hospitality gig to sustain that and bridge that gap. Yeah. Yeah.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (17:15)

Yeah,

 

yeah. was, yeah, obviously still living at home and everything then too. um, yeah, the, the little, I guess, pocket money of the games that we used to play. think my first contract was maybe like $500 and that was for the season. I was, yeah. So, yeah, not many women were living off that back when I first started.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (17:29)

Yeah ⁓

 

No, no, that’s quite the thing. Well, you’re listening to the Power of Women podcast and I’m joined by Australian women’s cricketer Jemma Barsby. And coming up in the conversation, we’re gonna talk about what really fuels Jemma’s ambition and how she prepares, competes and thrives whilst managing MS. That’s just a break in recording, Jemma. So that will do. Excellent.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (18:03)

So good.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (18:06)

So early on, were you driven by more the love of the game or was it the competitiveness that you learnt in the backyard that fuelled you?

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (18:18)

⁓ I’ve actually recently done my strength profiling, obviously being a leader within the side, SACO have been very good at letting me expand in my leadership side of things and my number one ⁓ strength came out was competitiveness. ⁓

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (18:21)

Mmm.

 

What was next?

 

What were the top three? Competitiveness?

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (18:45)

 

Then I used humor and then so that also humor is good but it also gets me in trouble sometimes when I take it too far. You know me too well already. ⁓

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (18:54)

can also be deflection, could also be deflection. yeah. Okay, so yeah. Number three,

 

what was the third one?

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (19:07)

Oh that is a very good question, I’ve gone blank. what was… Yeah, I’ll have to… Yeah, that is a very good question. Yeah, I’ll have to…

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (19:10)

That’s alright.

 

Let’s circle

 

back. Tell me about when humor’s got you into trouble.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (19:21)

⁓ so many times when I don’t process what my mind’s thinking for then it to come out of my mouth. It’s the bit where it like comes out and then it’s like that part where you just want to like put it back in your mouth because I’ve used it.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (19:27)

you

 

I do

 

that all the time. I say it’s an Aries trait. I’m not sure what star sign you are, Jemma.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (19:38)

I’m a Libra. Yeah, it’s yeah, it me dirty. Yeah.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (19:41)

Okay, okay.

 

Yeah, I mean, my standard line is, you know, I’ll speak now and apologize afterwards. And sometimes that works and sometimes it doesn’t. So, yeah.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (19:59)

I know and you think yeah

 

the older you get the more like you have time to filter it but now that I’m 30 I’m still making the same mistake so it’s like the girls just look at me and go you’re still making I’m like yeah I apologize and then yeah.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (20:07)

you

 

not going to stop. I’m over 60, Jemma, and I’m still doing it. So you’ve got years to go. So good luck with that. So could we get on to ⁓ your journey with MS? I know you’ve spoken openly about living with that.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (20:14)

Yeah ⁓

 

It’s good to know that then.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (20:36)

What’s the impact having multiple sclerosis has on your training and how you prepare every week?

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (20:44)

Yeah, yeah. So I’ve had it for about 10 years now. So I’ve been able to deal with it quite well. But I guess with MS, it’s the big unknown. Each day is different. I could wake up completely fine, go through training like there’s nothing wrong with me. there’s ⁓ days where I get really bad fatigue and have to, guess, chill out a bit. Or I get pins and needles and whatnot. know recently in the WBBL just gone, we had a hectic travel schedule. ⁓

 

and went through, yeah, it was pretty much really the play, we’d get on a flight. We went down to Hobart, so then it was obviously the Melbourne, well Adelaide, Melbourne, Melbourne to Tassie. And of course, like our flight got delayed, so I was like waiting around, and then that was a Sunday, and then the Monday I woke up and I had just had like, I was so fatigued, I was like, I was meant to go to training and stuff, and I was like, no, like I can’t get out of bed, so I was just laying ⁓ in bed all morning. ⁓

 

But it’s, guess like when I do have those bad days, it’s like that fighting of obviously I’m a very active person as well. So it’s like, okay, getting that rest in, also vitamin D is important to keep moving as well. So try and get out and get some fresh air and get some sun onto you. Just to, I guess, try and lye them back up.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (22:00)

That’s one of ⁓ the key supplements, isn’t it, for MS is vitamin D.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (22:06)

Yeah, it definitely is. that’s where I guess very thankful playing cricket. In the summer, I get a lot of vitamin D.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (22:12)

I was going to say,

 

yeah, so in actual fact, there’s a fantastic marriage of being outdoors and in the daylight and a natural way of addressing some of the symptoms.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (22:26)

Yeah, definitely. That’s where, yeah, very thankful that I’m able to still play cricket and it helps me get out and, ⁓ yeah, get some sunshine, but also food plays an important part too. So it’s just making sure that I’m, making sure that I’m fueling myself properly. And yeah, I guess I noticed that when I’m having, ⁓ if I have a couple of binge days or unleash a few days, like you can just know, feel a bit off. So it’s just, yeah, making sure that I fuel myself well in and around games, but also in life as well.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (22:37)

Mmm.

 

You mentioned that your diagnosis was about 10 years ago. Was there a period of time in the lead up to that that you had symptoms that you didn’t know what they were before MS was actually diagnosed?

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (23:16)

No, I had none whatsoever. ⁓ yeah. No, not that I even noticed. So it wasn’t until like, yeah, the tips of my fingers went all numb for about three weeks post. I get, yeah, post like the weekend that I was invited into the Aussie camp, bowl. That’s when I had, yeah, sore shoulder and all the tips of my fingers were numb and numb for weeks. And then that’s when I decided to say something. like, this is, this is a bit weird that my tips of the fingers are numb and have been for weeks. So, ⁓

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (23:19)

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (23:45)

I voice up and say something. I guess within the sporting realm and also cricket, we’re very fortunate to have such quick access to MRI scans. So yeah, we were straight into getting an MRI scan from there and yeah, that’s pretty much how I found out.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (23:57)

Mmm.

 

And how did that land at the time? For you.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (24:09)

Yeah, it was very overwhelming. I didn’t know what MS was. It was, I was kind of like, okay, like cool. When she told me, ⁓ but then it wasn’t until she was like, started telling me to still have my career, like my goals and aspirations. That’s when I knew it was something serious. And I did the silly thing of, ⁓ Dr. Google straight after. Yeah. Recommend. Yeah. I don’t recommend because like the first things I saw was.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (24:30)

Dr. Google. Of course you do. We all do. Yeah.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (24:38)

in a wheelchair, life’s not great. And I was like, oh, like that’s probably when it hit me. And I was like, okay, this is something pretty serious. And I remember, yeah, like walking out of the doctor’s, just absolutely balling my eyes out. Cause I was just like, I’ve just pretty much started my career career. I’m 19. I’m about to like live, go live my adult life. And to be told this, it’s like, what’s next? And I remember it was the Thursday afternoon and then,

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (25:02)

Mm.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (25:05)

not seeing the neurologist till the Monday. So being in that limbo of those days of being told you have an amnesia, but you’re just like, that was it. And you’re like, okay. And it wasn’t until saw the neurologist on the Monday to, I guess, go through it all and ask all the questions that I could. So yeah, was definitely, definitely overwhelming. And yeah, it was just taking it day by day from those next couple of months after that.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (25:31)

So what have you had to adapt in terms of your physical and mental prep to ensure that you can perform at your best despite this being in the background?

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (25:45)

Yeah, I find I’ve been very fortunate even though I have got MS that I’ve been able to play every game. I have not missed a game, Touchwood with Kruget. Yeah, with it. So yeah, I’ve been very fortunate. Obviously I have days where I wake up or I’ve got, have, I guess like little relapses throughout the game because of the heat brings symptoms on. it’s, it’s been smart. used to obviously being that young kid, just try and fight through it and be like,

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (25:53)

That’s amazing. Wow.

 

Mmm.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (26:13)

I’ll be fine. ⁓ Just head down. Yeah, that’s probably been the big learning over the years is actually to listen to my body and trying to tell me something when it’s, ⁓ I guess, yeah, having a bad day. So to rest and and to be open with the coaching staff, because I remember those definitely days throughout ⁓ pre-seasons or even trainings where I’m just like, I’m nowhere like the body’s starting to react.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (26:15)

Yeah, you’ve learnt a lesson.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (26:41)

And I try and push through where now I’m like, no, I’ve like I’ve got to say something or else will go on for days. So Yeah, I’ve definitely got better

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (26:49)

And

 

that’s a big deal, Jemma. Let’s just talk about that because I mean, you’re in a competitive space, you’re competitive by nature. We’ve already established that. How have you come to accept this degree and this level of openness without it feeling like it’s a bit of a leg rope that’s holding you back? Because that’s not easily done.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (27:19)

Yeah, yeah, don’t get me wrong. definitely still have, I fought that big time where I’m just like no power on, but yeah, but ⁓ I think it’s also, it just shows that if you’re open in you and you’re honest and you have that trust and that relationship with the coaching staff, then ⁓ they’re more willing to listen and being brave. think that’s as soon as you’re willing to be open and be vulnerable and be like, no, I need to have a

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (27:25)

I bet you do. Yeah.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (27:47)

quiet a day because I’m not feeling great ⁓ or can I reduce this and make up for it another day when I’m feeling better? ⁓ I think it just then gains that respect from them too of being like, right, like she actually must be feeling it. So we’ll just, yeah, so we’ll trust her and get on with it. And I think, yeah, obviously now being around for a long time in the cricketing circles, they know what I need to be able to prep for each game. So ⁓ they have that trust within me to

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (27:55)

Mm.

 

Mmm.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (28:16)

to be right still to go when games come along.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (28:20)

Yeah, and I think you’ve hit the nail on the head in terms of trust that goes both ways and that comes over time, but that is built through building rapport and it sounds like you have a fantastic network around you to sustain what you need to share and how you’re feeling.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (28:43)

Yeah, 100%. And even prior to like the season, I caught up with our dietitian and went through what I need or required because we’ve got a new coaching staff. So we got a new physio and ⁓ S and C. just so they were aware of what’s required during a game when it is hot. So what my pre-cooling strategies are. So if that’s slushies before a game to make sure my my in yeah, my body temperatures.

 

as cool as possible before going out there to play. it’s just that communication. we have a word document now that they’re aware of what I like in and around games. And then it’s just on me to be open of when I feel like I need that. then, yeah, more than happy to help out, which I’m forever thankful for.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (29:30)

What about the competitive space, Jemma? Do you feel supported by your competitors or do you think they look at that as perhaps ⁓ a point to actually gain momentum and one-upmanship?

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (29:44)

No, I don’t think so. think, yeah, they’re very good. think it’s, I think the more I’ve been able to speak about it be open about it, the more people are, guess, willing to more accepting of it. think at the start, people didn’t really know what MS was and was just kind of like, ⁓ like, go hurry up. But like, say if I’m wanting to drink, ⁓ more frequently, if I’m batting, ⁓ they’ll be like, ⁓ teams used to be like, come on. They were time wasting. Like we’re on a time limit.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (29:55)

Mmm.

 

Mmm.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (30:11)

But now

 

I think the more that I’ve been able to be open about, I guess, the symptoms and how I feel within a game, the ⁓ more respect and the more courtesy they have for me. And yeah, I can’t fault anyone, like any team or whatnot for that, where I just tell them I just need a couple extra drinks and they’re like, yeah, no worries, like take your time. yeah.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (30:32)

Yeah, that’s great.

 

Because I know even we’ve got the Australian Open on in Melbourne at the moment and I know as viewers and members ⁓ of the crowd, we make judgment calls when somebody’s taking longer between ends and the like, but we must never assume to know what’s actually going on ⁓ in the bigger scheme of things.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (30:57)

Yeah, 100%. I you nailed that on the head and even just in life in general as well. Just not with, I guess, the hate and that. just, yeah, in life you can’t judge people because you don’t know what they’re actually going through.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (31:02)

Mm-hmm.

 

Yeah. So I know with high performing athletes and we’ve had plenty of examples over the years where, and even in cricket, think Shane Warren took something and had to blame his mum. So we’ve got examples of that. But how do you manage the protocols of what you do to manage your condition and still fit?

 

within the confines of what the doping and regulations are as a professional athlete.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (31:46)

Yeah, definitely. know it was a bit uncertain when getting on medication for MS, obviously that’s you have to get going through those loopholes of what you can and can’t take as an athlete because yeah, we do get drug tested. So we had to triple check everything about the drug that I’m on, if it was accepted within the sporting avenue. even now I have to, I declare ⁓ when I do get drug tested that I am taking this so that they are

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (31:57)

Mmm.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (32:15)

aware of it. But yeah, it’s just now like triple checking everything with the dietitian. If there’s something out there, I send it to her or there’s an app that you can check to see if you’re allowed to take that within your sport. ⁓ it has got better over the years, but yeah, you have to be super careful, even just little things when you’re out buying. ⁓ For instance, if you’re at a juice store, I don’t know if I can name the store, but say a juice store and they have ⁓

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (32:16)

Mm.

 

Absolutely,

 

yeah.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (32:44)

Yeah, so if you’re for instance, you’re at a booth and you go and you see a protein ball, like we’re not allowed to have them because we’re not sure what protein they’re being is used. So it’s just like, I guess, things that I guess normal everyday people don’t even realize, but we have to make sure that we can’t have any of that anything that

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (32:53)

Mmm.

 

Yeah, so that

 

falls way outside your outside MS. That’s just everyday life. Yeah.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (33:09)

Yep, yeah, everyday life.

 

But yeah, within the MS stuff, I don’t really have anything. It’s just the medication that I had to get checked off and cleared to be sure that I can take that and still be able to play cricket and not get done.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (33:23)

you

 

Yeah, and look, and I’m sure that’s a moving minefield. I mean, it wasn’t until nine, even as recent as 1986 that we called PRP and blood doping and it was found to be performance enhancing because it sped up the way in which one recovers. And as a mere mortal, I know I can do it, but I’m pretty sure you’re not allowed to do it, I would guess.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (33:55)

Absolutely not. But yeah, we have people come around to us every season and tell us our do’s and don’ts of ⁓ what’s changed for the year. ⁓ For instance, we weren’t allowed up and goes the protein energizers for a while, but now we’re allowed. So it’s just forever changing and just making sure ⁓ we’re on top of if anything’s changed.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (33:58)

Yeah.

 

Is caffeine

 

an issue for you as an athlete? I mean, if you drank a Red Bull, is that problematic?

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (34:24)

Depends red the red balls are fine V’s when all I had to have so it’s even just live. Yeah Yep, so it’s even just little things like that where like one company might be fine But the other one is banned so you just yeah have to triple check everything to to make sure even Panadol there’s some Panadols that we’re not allowed to take even on game day out of competition like it just honestly you could go down a loophole with all like the

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (34:29)

wow, it’s very specific, yeah.

 

Mmm.

 

Wow.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (34:52)

the do’s and don’ts and within competition without the competition. It’s crazy.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (34:58)

So was opening up about having MS an easy decision or was it a strategic one to make your management of it easier?

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (35:12)

I think ⁓ I’ve been very fortunate over the years ⁓ that I’ve been on a lot of panels with MS and just hearing other people’s, ⁓ the way they obviously found out they got diagnosed and just the way they live their life with MS. yeah, it was quite ⁓ a real eye-opener for me where obviously, like I said prior, we get MRIs very quickly where people, ⁓ it takes them six months to a year to get an MRI. ⁓

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (35:40)

Yeah.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (35:42)

And it was just a real eye-opener for me and to even then hear people get discriminated at work because they look completely fine, but they might be having a really bad day, but their boss tells them to push on because, ⁓ I can’t see anything wrong with you. So I think it was the more that I sat on those panels and spoke to other people living with MS that I was like, wow, like some people have gone through hell with this, let alone being diagnosed and found out all that process to then.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (35:58)

you

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (36:11)

⁓ have that going on as well. That’s when I kind of realized I was like, right, with the little platform and profile that I have, I’m going to try and create that awareness. And even just talking about it now with people, ⁓ day to day, they go, ⁓ I know someone with MS and I know someone with MS and it’s actually incredible how many people do actually know people living with MS. I guess with anything, the more we speak about it, the more we can normalize it and ⁓

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (36:12)

Mmm.

 

Mmm.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (36:40)

and help those people living with MS.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (36:43)

Yeah, I think that’s fantastic. Are there other professional athletes ⁓ in the current day that have come out and shared their story with the same condition?

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (36:56)

I know this lady I met her through when I was working with MS Queensland. ⁓ name’s like Janine Watson. ⁓ She does taekwondo at the Paralympics and she’s a great example of, ⁓ she’s in and out of a wheelchair. So some days she’s having a really bad day, so she’s in a wheelchair. Other days she’s walking around ⁓ completely fine. So yeah, I just remember her so clearly and even just

 

how competitive she is where she’s like, she’ll even sometimes at competitions. Yeah. So sometimes you’ll rock up in a wheelchair and then get out and just go to town on her competitor and then get back in the wheelchair. it’s kind of.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (37:28)

in such a physical sport.

 

There could be an advantage in that. Yeah, they might not see

 

you coming as a real threat.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (37:45)

Yeah, so yeah, she’s been

 

incredible to get to know and learn her story over the years as well.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (37:52)

Yeah, fantastic. So has living with MS changed your definition of strength as an athlete?

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (38:03)

Yeah, obviously cricket in general is a tough sport and then to add on trying to play with that with MS, I guess it gave me ⁓ real resilience and ⁓ but also gratitude that I’m able to still play the sport and cricket is about 90 % bad times or annoying times and that 10 % gets me back ⁓ playing with the fun times. So, ⁓

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (38:25)

you

 

Sounds like a golf game.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (38:30)

Yeah, there’s days where you question why you play and it’s that 10 % that gets you

 

over the line of that competitiveness of winning a game. Yeah, but yeah, I think it’s just that competitive side of me that always kicks through and ⁓ shines through, especially when times do get tough.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (38:48)

Yeah, well done. Well done you. So finally, as a message to the power of women community Jemma, for women watching athletes or not managing health alongside ambition, what does sustainable ambition look like when you’ve got to factor in your body as part of the equation?

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (39:15)

Yeah, think we touched on it earlier. I think it’s that openness to tell people around you how you’re feeling, to lean on the support networks that you build throughout, even if that’s family, friends, work colleagues, yeah, earning that trust within them and them giving it back. I think that’s a massive way of being able to live with MS within everyday life, work life, sporting life.

 

Yeah, to know that yes, you are going to have your ups and downs, but to be able to lean on those ones around you to get you through those ⁓ tougher days is really crucial and to be willing to accept help along the way too. think that’s massive and something I continue to tell myself and is a good learning for me too is to, yeah, that it’s okay to ask for help and lean on the ones around you.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (40:09)

Mm.

 

And I think Jemma and I think the audience would agree, all of what you’ve just said and those traits and that vulnerability relates to life, whether you’re carrying a condition such as the one that you’ve got to cope with or not. think being vulnerable, knowing when to ask to help, all of those things can belong to the journey of life.

 

I think you’ve probably named really the recipe of that journey of how you face into the good days and the bad. But your job has probably a higher level of satisfaction. The bar’s higher than the average. think most people probably don’t have only the 10%. I think they’ve probably got a slightly better balance. So you live in very high performance.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (40:58)

Yeah.

 

Hahaha

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (41:12)

space with all of you’ve got going on. think you just do the most incredible job. And as I opened up this podcast, I said, I think you’re a winner already and there is no doubt about it. I imagine you have made those around you very, very proud.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (41:31)

Nah, thank you. Thank you for the kind words. And yeah, hopefully I can continue to help people along the way and ⁓ hopefully, yeah, one day be able to find a cure or be able to help people living with MS and people just in general. think, yeah, I think that’s it’d be pretty cool achievement.

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (41:42)

Mmm.

 

So how many years of cricket still in front of you Jemma? What’s the average age of retirement age for a cricketer? You’re coming up on 30, yeah.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (41:53)

 

Yeah, I am 30. So turn 30 and yeah, hit my thirties. I thought that day would never come, but here it is. But yeah, people, people actually play well into their mid thirties. Yeah. Some are even hit that the 37 mark. So I still have a few years left in me, hopefully. And I guess that main thing obviously in sport, goes down to your performance and, the love and drive for it as well. So if the love and drives there and I’m still playing

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (42:01)

You’ve hit 30.

 

Mmm.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (42:29)

Good cricket then yeah, hopefully continue playing for many more years to come. That’d be nice

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (42:34)

Yeah, brilliant. Well, you’re a fantastic role model in terms of the sport, in terms of life. I know the MS community value the ⁓ work that you’re doing and being a voice for it. It’s a powerful way to your life, Jemma. And you’ve got to cope with…

 

more hurdles than the average and you do it brilliantly. So thank you for your honesty and thank you for the inspirational messages that you’ve shared with us today. It’s been an absolute pleasure talking with you.

 

JEMMA BARSBY [Guest] (43:10)

No, I’m dying. Thank you for having me on the podcast. It’s yeah, I’m very appreciative. So thank you

 

DI GILLETT [Host] (43:15)

Brilliant. Wonderful. So if I think I’d put it to anybody to share what Jemma’s had to say to us today, because the fact of the fact of life of being able to show up every day, despite the hurdles that you may face and do it in a competitive environment, this becomes such an inspirational message for somebody that you feel you could give just at that little bit of a boost and a little bit of a nudge over the line.

 

Please share. Until next time.

 

 

Chapters:

00:00 Empowerment Through Voice and Purpose

01:38 The Journey into Cricket: Family and Inspiration

07:41 Transitioning to Professional Cricket: Mentorship and Growth

10:09 The Reality of Women’s Cricket: Pay Disparities and Professionalism

13:04 The Love of the Game: From Passion to Profession

18:27 Living with MS: Challenges and Adaptations

25:53 Building Trust: Openness in a Competitive Environment

33:03 Raising Awareness: The Importance of Sharing Stories

36:08 Redefining Strength: Resilience in the Face of Adversity

37:49 Sustainable Ambition: Balancing Health and Performance

 

Connect with Di:

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Contact Di

 

Find Jemma Barsby at:

LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/jemma-barsby-210116103/

Instagram https://www.instagram.com/jemmaabb/?hl=en

 

This is the home of unapologetic conversations and powerful stories of reinvention. New episodes drop every Monday to fuel your week with insights on leadership, resilience, and success. Subscribe and join a community of women who are changing the game.

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Financial Abuse, Economic Coercion and Creating Safety by Design

Financial Abuse, Economic Coercion and Creating Safety by Design

What if financial abuse isn’t a hidden issue, but a structural one?

This episode includes discussion of domestic and family violence.

On the Power Of Women Podcast, Di Gillett sits down with Catherine Fitzpatrick – former bank executive turned social entrepreneur and Founder of Flequity Ventures, to understand how financial systems can be weaponised and what it truly means to design safety into products, services and policy.

With more than two decades across banking, government, ASX-listed companies and regulation, Catherine has led national reforms that are reshaping how institutions respond to – and prevent – financial abuse.

This is not theory.
This is reform grounded in evidence and lived experience and we all need to hear it.

 

➡️ In this conversation, we explore:

  • Why financial abuse is often the central mechanism of coercive control
  • How everyday products: bank accounts, insurance, utilities, can be misused
  • The chilling rise of abusive micro-transactions and digital monitoring
  • What “safety by design” looks like inside major institutions
  • Why over 60 organisations have now adopted financial abuse terms into their fine print
  • The role men can and must play in disrupting abuse
  • The financial questions every woman should be able to answer without hesitation

 

➡️Key learnings:

Financial abuse is structural, not just personal

Prevention must be built into products

Financial literacy now includes financial safety

Every woman should know where her name sits financially

 

Support [Australia]:

  • If you or someone you know is affected by domestic and family violence, contact 1800RESPECT, the national service for free and confidential counselling, information and support. Call 1800 737 732 or chat online 24/7 at www.1800respect.org.au
  • If you or someone you know is an Aboriginal or Torres Strait Islander person in need of a culturally safe support line, you can call 13YARN (13 92 76)
  • In an emergency, or if you are not feeling safe, always call the police on 000
📖 Read the full transcript of this conversation here 👇

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (00:02)

I’m Catherine Fitzpatrick. a former bank executive turned social entrepreneur. I believe that safety isn’t accidental and nor is equity. Both of them are designed. I work with businesses, industry, government and regulators around the globe to show them how domestic abusers are misusing everyday products and services and how safer design can close those loopholes.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (00:32)

What if financial abuse isn’t a hidden issue, but a structural one? And what if it isn’t about bad actors, but about systems that lack safeguards? And then what if the most powerful form of prevention actually starts in their design? Today’s conversation is about the money we don’t talk about because as we know, money is often a taboo topic. The risks women aren’t taught to look for and the systems that need to change.

 

I’m Di Gellert and this is the Power of Women podcast. And my guest today has an extraordinary depth of understanding in this particular topic, both intellectually and structurally. Catherine Fitzpatrick has spent more than two decades inside Australia’s most powerful institutions, banking, government, ASX listed companies, and not-for-profits and media. And she’s seen up

 

close how financial systems can either protect people or in fact be weaponized against them. She’s led national reforms, advised regulators and governments and now as the founder of FLEQUITY Ventures is reshaping how financial products, services and policies are designed with safety at their core. Catherine doesn’t speak about financial abuse from theory. She speaks from evidence reform.

 

and lived proximity to harm. And given the abuses are ever present in society, conversations such as this one are essential. Catherine Fitzpatrick, welcome to the Power of Women podcast.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (02:16)

Thank you. I’m really excited to be having this conversation because not many people know about financial abuse, but also people don’t quite understand how products and services, everyday ones, are being manipulated to cause the harm. So I’m really excited to dive into that with you.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (02:33)

Fabulous and I think what I’d really love to be able to achieve for the listeners is highlighting the different forms in which it takes and some strategies to help put in place some of the safeguards for women in particular. But at the same point I want to touch on, because I know your passion about it, what men can do to help.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (03:00)

Yeah, there’s so many things that we can do individually, but also if you’re working in an organisation where you might not have seen before what’s going on, once you see it, you can’t unsee it. And so you feel compelled to do something. And I think it’s been a real awakening for me when I first saw this happening.

 

quite a number of years ago and then for everyone I talked to the light bulb switches on and you just have to do something.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (03:32)

Brilliant and that’s exactly what you’re doing. So when people hear the term financial abuse, so many people think that’s kind of secondary to physical or emotional abuse. But from your perspective, is financial abuse a central mechanism of control?

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (03:56)

Yes, absolutely. Financial abuse is when someone uses money or access to money to control or manipulate another person. And it is something that can happen very quietly by stealth over time. And it can be a precursor to physical violence or it could occur alongside physical violence. We know that financial abuse happens in

 

more than 90 % of cases where there are physical violence is being used, it is a form of domestic abuse. It is, and it is something that we know that financial abuse can often, or is most often accompanied by harassment and monitoring and tracking, which we’re seeing a lot more of.

 

as we’re moving to this digital society. ⁓ And it’s quite often what keeps women, mainly women, but not just women, trapped in a relationship that is really abusive and controlling and manipulating because they don’t have the means to leave, they don’t have the means to start again. And ⁓ we know from fantastic research that Anne Summers has done that it can often mean

 

a choice between violence or poverty.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (05:27)

neither of those are palatable. yeah. So you’ve said people don’t just weaponize ⁓ behavior, they weaponize products and services. Can you explain what that really looks like when we’re talking about banking, utilities, insurance, all of those points of financial engagement that we have ⁓ with institutions?

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (05:55)

Absolutely. So if I talk a little bit more, I never want to excuse the behaviour of the person who is exerting control through access to money. So what this could look like in a relationship is that it could be limiting a partner’s access to money unless they do what you say. It could be tracking or challenging every dollar that they spend.

 

until they give up trying and they’re solely dependent on you. It could be belittling ⁓ your ability or their ability to manage money and until they just believe you, I’m so bad with money and they beg that you will take it over.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (06:39)

So money’s weaponized, it’s a psychological drip feed.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (06:44)

Absolutely. And it could also can be criminal, right? It could be racking up debt in somebody else’s name without their knowledge or consent. ⁓ And that’s done so that they can never leave, so that they can’t start again and so that they’ll regret breaking up with you if they do end up being able to leave that situation. ⁓ What we do know is that unlike physical violence, financial abuse often involves

 

the misuse of a product or a service ⁓ or a system. What do I mean by that? So in banking, it could look like racking up debt in somebody else’s name, taking out a credit card because you know enough about that person to be able to open it within minutes online without their knowledge and use that credit card and rack up that debt.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (07:39)

How would you know that’s happened, Catherine? Would you have any idea?

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (07:43)

It’s really awful, but a lot of people don’t know what’s happened until it’s happened multiple times and they’re tens of thousands of dollars in debt. A way that you can make sure you’re keeping an eye on that, which is something we should all be doing in any case because of the rise of scams, is check your credit report. It’s free and you can do it online and some banks also will allow you to do it in their apps. But you can go online

 

check your credit report and you can see what debts you have. And I know I’ve looked at it, you know, in over the years and I do make sure I do it about twice a year. You can look at it and you can see, hang on a second, I never applied for this or there’s a credit card here that I didn’t know about. We’re seeing fraudsters do that all the time. So you need to be a bit hot on it too because one, there’s debt in your name.

 

to if that if you don’t pay it or if the person doesn’t pay it if they’re a criminal they’re not going to that liability puts a black mark on your credit score and that means if you got to apply for another loan or even if you’re applying for buy now pay later that with you you are and it

 

damages your score and then it impacts on your ability to get on with your own life. So it’s quite a bit to unpick it. So you should be taking a look at that. The other products that are weaponized, so I’ve done for the last three years, I’ve been writing what I call the perpetrator playbook for business. And it’s basically documenting the ways that abusers are misusing products and services. Not as a how-to guide, because they’ve actually already got it, but it’s.

 

how businesses could intervene, guide.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (09:36)

that, preventative strategy.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (09:39)

It is,

 

it is. so other examples would be in insurance. There were two big things that came through ⁓ research, which and ⁓ speaking to victim survivors. One is that if you have a joint policy with somebody, a lot of times you can change that policy online. It’s really simple to do that or with a really simple phone call. But

 

quite often the joint policy holder is not alerted to those changes. why? Yeah, it’s basically because insurers have taken the friction out of the system, which is really fantastic, right? You can do…

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (10:20)

There’s an upside and a downside to that. I mean, if your partner’s passed away? So there’s the upside, however.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (10:27)

However, if you are in an abusive situation, what we know is that abusers may cancel an insurance policy or change it without the co-insured knowing. I spoke to one woman ⁓ for my paper on general insurance who said that she didn’t know that the home insurance was cancelled.

 

until her ex-partner threatened to burn the house down with her and the children inside it.

 

And when she discovered that she was no longer insured to add salt into the wound, they had repaid the premium into his account, even though she’d been paying for it for many years. one of my recommendations was. insurers need to change the system and put a bit more friction into that. I’ve been really pleased. In fact, my own insurer, I saw a notification

 

saying that if you do make some changes we will notify the co-insured to make sure everyone’s happy with that. ⁓ Fantastic.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (11:37)

Yeah,

 

no surprises.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (11:41)

Yeah and I think

 

it does and there are really simple things like that that different organisations can do. Other examples just from everyday accounts, I looked at energy and water last year. Who would have thought your electricity account could be manipulated? The same with your

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (12:00)

I that’s something that I wouldn’t even think about as being at risk. So what happens there?

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (12:07)

It basically anywhere, any type of service where it’s a joint account, so it’s in more than one name, or where there is credit or debt that’s related to it. So if you’re getting billing from an electricity provider or an energy provider or a water provider, they’re in effect giving you credit and you need to pay that back, right, when you pay your bill. So we know that debt is the weapon of choice for financial abusers.

 

what they will do is not pay it ⁓ and then leave that debt in your name. ⁓

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (12:46)

We

 

saw quite frequently. the ⁓ non-provision of that service in that being turned off.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (12:55)

Potentially water doesn’t get turned off but they might slow it but electricity certainly gets turned off. absolutely. The other thing that we see with any joint accounts or any online services and it doesn’t matter what kind of service it is, is that it’s really easy if you know enough about somebody to get in login to their account and see what they’re doing.

 

which means that abusers are using online access to monitor and to surveil their partner or ex-partner. And I can give you an example of this ⁓ where in banking where I used to work in a couple of Australia’s major banks, when you have an account, you can see who’s spending money where. A number of the banks have also got these really

 

great fraud protection, which is an alert whenever your account has some money taken out of it. When it’s a joint account and those alerts go to more than one person, or if it’s a credit card and they’re going to the primary credit card holder, and we know most of the time that is the male partner in a relationship and the female partner has a secondary card, the alerts might go to somebody.

 

and they can see what’s happening in that account. And if it’s a relationship where there is abuse, ⁓ then, or violence, then they can monitor what is happening. So, you know, taking money out at the ATM, for example, ⁓ or put it, squirreling money away so that you can flee that unsafe relationship, ⁓ that can all be monitored.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (14:45)

That’s that’s goosebumps stuff because it’s so ⁓ unexpected. It’s so easy to have somebody actually monitoring your movements and presumably that in the same way if you’ve moved that gives them access to your address and all sorts of other details that could leave somebody extremely vulnerable.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (15:13)

Yeah, most businesses have built their systems and their products and their services as if every relationship is healthy and that there isn’t any violence in it. Which means that the systems are built when that two people are enmeshed and they’re not necessarily being able to manage that account as if they’re two individuals in the one account.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (15:39)

That’s

 

a great example to understand what’s going on.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (15:43)

Yeah, and so if you think about it, the systems are built like that. I’ve worked inside big organisations. It’s millions and millions of dollars to unpick those systems. I joke about it, it’s a bit facetious, but I have said, you know, we’ve built the systems around the patriarchy and unpicking the patriarchy is really expensive.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (16:00)

Yes,

 

yep kind of heard that somewhere before.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (16:04)

Yeah, that’s right. Yeah. I want to give you, yeah, I also just want to give you probably the example that crystallized things for me when I said, when I really understood how products and services are being weaponized was in 2019, I worked for Australia’s biggest bank, Commonwealth Bank, and I had set up a specialist team supporting

 

customers experiencing vulnerability and particularly we had a focus on people experiencing domestic abuse and also people experiencing problem gambling. And when I visited the team I was talking to them about the kinds of things they were doing to help our customers and one of them showed me in the account of a woman that she was helping these deposits into that account from the ex-partner.

 

and they were one cent at a time. And in the transaction description, you know where we would write, thanks for dinner, we might write the invoice number, we might say happy birthday. There were messages of abuse. And then I spoke to the team and I said, ⁓ is this happening all the time? Have you all seen this? And they said, yeah, we see it all the time. And it’s really chilling.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (17:12)

Yep.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (17:27)

when also we see the messages saying, love you, I want you back. It’s like a secret. It was. And so I had a team of data scientists and I said to them, can you just take a look at this and see what you can find? We’d only had one complaint to the bank about this, but they did ⁓ analysis and they looked through 11 million transactions in a three month period. And what they found was 8,000

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (17:33)

S.I.G.S.S.S.S. ⁓

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (17:57)

really serious forms of abusive messages. I read one, 900 messages, one cent at a time, it cost the abuser $9. It included messages like, I’m out the front, I can see you, I want to kill you, I want to kill them all.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (18:18)

What do do with that?

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (18:20)

Well,

 

when my team showed me first of all, I burst into tears and just said, I can’t believe this is happening. How awful can

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (18:27)

people be.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (18:30)

I still get goosebumps because it was just something so unexpected. We hadn’t been looking for it. didn’t know about it.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (18:39)

patterns.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (18:46)

It is mind blowing and so that’s when I met, so we talked to a lot of people with lived experience, we talked to the women’s safety sector, to consumer advocates and also the e-safety commissioner and she said, well why don’t you apply safety by design? And so we mapped a whole lot of interventions that we could have done, 52 possible interventions and the first one was we need to detect these patterns, we need to

 

block the abuse of messages and we started doing that. I took this evidence to all the banks and all the banks in Australia have now moved on this. The majority of them have got blocks in place. More than a million abusive messages have been blocked in real time. Not by stopping the money but masking or sending a message to the person who’s trying to send the abuse to say you’re not allowed to do it anymore.

 

and you have to change the message. A number of them have got artificial intelligence and they’re monitoring the pattern and then they’re writing to the sender, yeah, they’re writing to the people who are sending it and they’re saying, we can see you, you’ve got to stop. And what we know is that more than 90 % of people who get those warning letters stop sending the messages.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (20:08)

Who would have thought a, I mean, we’ve got a heightened alert to high value transactions being the problem. Who thought these nondescript one and two cent transactions could be carrying as much danger?

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (20:25)

That’s right. And could you imagine receiving those messages, especially if you had those alerts and it was popping up all the time, like just it’s another form of control and fear and intimidation. ⁓ Some people had written in it, unblock me from Facebook. It was like the last resort. But now the banks are watching and they’re doing something about it. And I think that that’s it’s a really fantastic ⁓ example of.

 

We didn’t see it, we didn’t understand it, but once we started looking at it, everyone was saying, we can’t walk past this, we’ve got to do something about it. So that’s what’s really inspired my work.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (21:05)

I can imagine. mean that’s a, that is such a significant example that most people wouldn’t even think could happen.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (21:15)

Exactly.

 

We also see it on higher value transactions like child support and those sorts of things. It’s just, it’s awful. People can be awful to everybody.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (21:25)

Wow. So you’ve led, and that leads into this question because you’ve led reforms such as this. What actually shifts when an organisation stops saying, you know, how do we respond? And to this point, start actually baking it into preventative processes in their systems in the first places. Are there more examples like that?

 

or examples that haven’t necessarily taken place but should take place.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (22:01)

Yeah, there’s a very long list, I’m also really pleased that lots of people are, you know, I’m pushing on open doors having these conversations, which I think is really exciting. So what I would say is most organisations and most businesses will start with when they think about domestic abuse, they start with how do we support our colleagues who might be experiencing domestic abuse?

 

How do we give them time out when they need it? How do we help them with their safety? So that is absolutely the right place to start. Look after your colleagues. A number of organisations are also saying, ⁓ we also need to think about our colleagues who are using violence and abuse because we know that it is so prevalent in our society and every…

 

every person I talk to, whether it’s in business, in my personal life, in government, in regulators, everyone knows somebody who is impacted by domestic abuse, whether they were a victim or they are a victim, whether they are using violence, whether they grew up in a house or they know children who are also experiencing abuse. So this is something that touches everybody. So in your workplace, you’ve got to think about

 

people who are both experiencing and using.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (23:29)

saying that, I was thinking, actually I don’t, and then I’ve just gone, actually I do. It’s quite a challenge to actually think that through your own personal lens.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (23:36)

Yeah. Yeah.

 

Yeah, and you know, you will also know people even if they never disclose to you.

 

because they’re living with it and they’re deeply ashamed whether they are using violence or they are living in that fear. ⁓ So it is just so prevalent in our society and just so many people I talk to, they know someone or as we start talking about financial abuse, they’re realizing, I’ve got a friend or even this is happening to me actually.

 

⁓ I think that’s why this conversation is so important and why I’m just so up for having it all the time. So that’s where most businesses will start. They’ll start with their workplace and that’s absolutely the right place. Then they move to customers. So if you are a B2C business ⁓ and you’re supporting customers, there will also be victim survivors who are saying, this is happening to me, can you help me?

 

And banks are one of those places where people quite often go to first and in fact there’s research that shows women are more likely to talk to their bank about economic abuse than they are to go to a specialist service. It is and why is that? Because I want to set up a safe account so that I can leave. I need to disentangle from the abuser and I need to start again. And if you don’t have money you don’t have choices.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (25:02)

Isn’t that interesting?

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (25:18)

I think that that’s a really critical role for banks, but it is also for other organisations as well. then people will think about that from their customer service perspective and they’ll say, what do I need to do if someone tells me they need help? How can I help them? Quite frequently it’s because they can’t pay a debt. What my work is doing and where we’re now seeing this shift is

 

actually are our products and services inadvertently enabling this abuse? And I gave you those examples. So yeah, if you don’t have friction in the system, it will be exploited and it is being exploited. Whoa, we didn’t mean for that to happen. So what do we do about it? So it’s like we have these conversations and these people in business are going, I’ve never seen it like that before. That’s not why I’m here in business.

 

That’s not what we’re here to do. We’re here to serve our customers. So, okay, we can start treating this like a risk management process and start closing those gaps. So I gave you the example about the abuse in payment descriptions. And so that’s been a very comprehensive one. ⁓ And then we also know that, say, I can give you an example from insurance. ⁓ A number of insurers have now

 

in what’s called a conduct of others clause. Now I feel like the world’s biggest feminard, I read terms and conditions all the time right? Join me feminards unite. But it is it’s really important to have look at what’s in the fine print. We’ve just done about 200 or so.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (27:06)

I

 

been working on for long and realised that my car for the last three years has been insured as a diesel when it’s a petrol so sometimes it’s not even the really fine print but…

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (27:17)

It’s so

 

important, it’s really important you need to read it particularly in insurance where you know a claim can turn on where a comma is placed basically. So in insurance there is most insurance products have got a term that’s called ⁓ malicious damage and there’s an exclusion. What that means is if I deliberately smashed up my television

 

I can’t go and claim it and say, thanks, I’d really like a television. In an abusive situation, it might be someone who lives in the house or who’s invited to the house and they may damage property or destroy property as part of a domestic abuse situation.

 

Yeah, and because of the malicious damage exclusion, what we know is that victim survivors are then penalised again because they can’t claim. So they’re getting the abuse, the violence and then the financial penalty, they don’t have the protection that they thought. So a number of insurers have started introducing what’s called a conduct of others clause. And what that means is that

 

If those kinds of situations happen, it could also happen where someone has a mental illness and they are causing property damage as well during an episode, the insurer is now saying, well actually we’re going to take that into account and we might pay out on a claim that otherwise would be denied. So that’s a fantastic

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (28:57)

These are fantastic clothes.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (28:59)

It is. so I would be checking and asking your insurer, do you have a conduct of others?

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (29:06)

You know what

 

I’m doing after this podcast, I’m going to do a deep dive because I’ve got a home insurance policy coming up for renewal. I’m going to do exactly that. And I would challenge anybody listening to this to do the same.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (29:19)

Yeah, you absolutely should. A number have got them, but not everyone has. It was a recommendation of a big parliamentary inquiry a couple of years ago that every insurer should do it. So do ask your insurers about it. It’s really important. Another example, and I know I’m going deep into ⁓ nerd territory, feminine territory.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (29:43)

What other fine print have you read?

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (29:45)

So

 

there’s another one. In 2022 when I wrote my first Design to Disrupt paper I made a recommendation that every bank and then subsequently every company should put in their terms financial abuse is a really serious problem. If you misuse our products for financial abuse there will be consequences. It could be that we warn you, it could be that we suspend you, we might close your account.

 

or might even report you to law enforcement.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (30:17)

the do not smoke warning.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (30:19)

Correct. put it out there. Exactly. Yeah. It’s also the same as after September 11. Yes. We know we cannot joke about terrorism and get on a plane. Yep. So this recommendation is not about saying I’m going to close every, we want to close everyone’s account. It’s actually about saying, is the standard we expect. This is what respect looks like. We don’t want to inadvertently enable your abuse. So if you do it,

 

You can’t be part of our organisation. Nowhere had ever done that before in the world. ⁓ And I launched it. No one had done that in this context around financial abuse. By the first, after the first year of advocating for that with the Centre for Women’s Economic Safety, and we partnered on my first paper, 14 banks had moved on that recommendation, which was terrific.

 

And so last, no, gosh, doesn’t time fly. In 2024, I launched a campaign called Respect and Protect, which was to encourage every organisation to do that. There’s now more than 60 companies that have those terms. They range from banks to insurers to energy to water to there’s a fintech startup in their education. There’s health insurance.

 

There’s a lot of different organisations that are embracing this. That is a safety by design measure and it’s really putting perpetrators on notice. This is a standard of behaviour that we don’t accept, we don’t tolerate, we don’t want you to weaponise our products. A bank account, an insurance account is no place for abuse if you do it there’s consequences.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (32:13)

We have a lot to thank you for, Catherine.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (32:16)

Well, I have a lot to thank survivors who have entrusted me with their stories and people who work in the sector who have been doing this for decades for spending time with me and helping me to understand what is going on. think my superpower is that

 

I’m the translator. I’ve been working inside corporates for such a long time that I know this is a policy change, a procedure change, a process. Does it require training? Is it in risk management? I can use all the nerd words and the words inside an organisation that help to translate it into practical action.

 

And I think that’s why, and I also think people genuinely want to help and they don’t know what to do. So here’s a bit of a toolkit, the financial safety by design toolkit I call it.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (33:11)

Well coming up we’re going to talk about the warning signs women often miss, the financial questions women should be able to answer and why more men are stepping forward and asking to help.

 

If you’re loving the Power of Women podcasts, be sure to jump onto our YouTube channel and hit that subscribe button to ensure you never miss an episode.

 

Catherine, in recent months you’ve been talking about the fact that men have been reaching out and asking, what can I do to help? What do you think is actually prompting that and is that actually helping the work that you do?

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (33:57)

Yeah, absolutely. It’s funny, I have been doing this work for a number of years and it’s always been with the support and leadership of fabulous men and women ⁓ who are just, who like me, think that this is an issue that we all need to tackle.

 

What I think is really hard is it’s hard sometimes to know where to start. It’s a violence against women and financial abuse is part of that is such a big problem that it can feel really overwhelming. And I have found a number of people have also said to me, I don’t want to get it wrong. What if I do the wrong thing? What if I make it worse for that person? ⁓ And

 

What if I say the wrong thing? First of all, you are going to say the wrong thing probably. want to tell you know, more than 30 years ago, I was a young journalist. That’s how I started my career. Much younger. And ⁓ I met a woman. But I met a woman who meeting her has impacted me profoundly.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (35:11)

Stampiness.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (35:22)

We were the same age, her name’s Anne O’Neill. ⁓ She had suffered a terrible, terrible crime and she’d lost both of her children. She was wounded for life and I was the first journalist to ever speak to her. ⁓ And I asked her a question that is so often on many people’s lips, right? I said, what did you do? Because I couldn’t fathom.

 

that this person could do something. Like, it’s like, you must have provoked him, right? Was going through my head. And she said to me, Catherine, it wasn’t what I did. This was what he did. And I just felt mortified. And she explained to me.

 

with her really quiet and unassuming and very gracious way how domestic abuse works. And it’s never the victim’s fault. And it’s never something that they’ve done. It’s a person making a choice to use violence, intimidation, technology, finance to control another person. And so what I say to people when they ask me,

 

you know, when they say I’m worried about getting it wrong is you may not use the right words, but if you believe somebody when they are telling you this is happening to me, that’s the place to start. And a lot of the men who I talk to are in positions of power. And so they have the ability to set the tone in their organization about gender equality. And they also have the position of power.

 

to lead change, is ⁓ flushing out this issue, having discussions about it, not with blame, but having a really uncomfortable conversation, and it is uncomfortable, but stepping into it and making sure that your workplace is a safe place and making sure your products and services are safe. The more organizations that do that, the better. It’s why last

 

my goodness, it’s beginning of 26. So end of 2024, ⁓ I co-founded with a not-for-profit thriving communities Australia, Australia’s business alliance against domestic and family violence. It’s called One Generation. There’s seven corporates from across different sectors that are all part of it. And our aim is to get to understand what will help victims survivors when they are your customers.

 

so that everyone can do more of that.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (38:08)

So this is a B2B platform. Sorry, a B2C platform.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (38:11)

It is.

 

So it’s basically there are seven corporates drawn from different sectors. They are part of the One Generation Alliance and our aim is to, we’re just working on lived experience research to understand if you have a customer who is experiencing domestic abuse, what is going to serve them the best? What are the things that you need to do? Because we know not everyone’s doing it and they’re not doing it well.

 

There are plenty of organisations that are doing it well, so we’re learning from them and learning directly from customers. What did you need from organisations and how can everyone do that? There are things like, don’t make me tell my story over and over and over again. Yeah, that’s right. ⁓ Don’t ask me for evidence that I don’t have. Not everyone goes to police. Not everyone will get a conviction.

 

but please believe me. So there are very simple things that you can do in training. And so that’s what that alliance is doing. And I think that that’s why when we have practical tips that are really well informed by people with lived experience, by people who are working with them and are practical suggestions, I think that’s why more and more people are coming in and asking, what can I do?

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (39:37)

That is such a powerful example because I mean we all know that the reverse is how systems are set up. You you go for an insurance claim and it starts with an interrogative process and you’re always on the back foot. So just that simple premise of, please believe me, and changing the lens in which the dialogue is framed.

 

changes everything. Now yes, there are people who are looking to scam systems and the like. That’s not what we’re talking about. We’re talking about people who are coming in in times of need and personal distress.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (40:22)

Yeah and you know I also get asked a lot about well what happens if someone’s trying to rip us off and someone’s lying about this. Well first of all we know that very very few people who are victims of violence lie about it. There is a narrative that there are false reports but that is it’s very very seldom that that happens. In fact the data shows it just doesn’t

 

right? Very frequently. ⁓ Most organisation, if someone is coming to you and saying this is it I’m experiencing this you should believe it because they just need your help and most of the time they’ll come and ask and say can you just give me time to pay or it actually I was coerced into this debt or it I didn’t even know about it so it is one of the reasons I say that financial abuse should be treated in the same way as we treat fraud and scam.

 

because quite frequently that’s what’s happening to a survivor. They’ve got fraudulent debt, you know, if you get a debt, ⁓ if you get a credit card, something happening on your credit card, you didn’t know about it, it’ll be wiped off because that’s fraud and banks are insured against that. If it’s a scam, we’re now seeing much more…

 

response, you know, ⁓ a greater and collective response from business and government actually to respond to this organised crime ⁓ and scams. And we don’t have the same response, unfortunately, to financial abuse, but it is very similar tactics that people are using. And I do believe that we need to see that happen across Australia.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (42:09)

So if we move away from businesses just for a second and start to look at individuals one on one, could you give us a little bit of an overview of what are the early warning signs that somebody might be experiencing financial abuse? Because I’m thinking if we take the educational lens of this isn’t something a listener is experiencing, but what

 

what might they be looking to observe in their broader sphere of day-to-day contacts and community.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (42:49)

Yeah, and I think I find as we talk about financial abuse, the light bulbs go on. What we know from research is most people who are in it don’t recognise it. And that’s why it’s really important we do have these conversations to raise awareness. So financial abuse is where someone is using money or access to money to control another person. What that might look like for someone who’s experiencing it is their choice is being taken away.

 

their knowledge is being taken away. ⁓ So really practical examples and ones that I hear a lot ⁓ is ⁓ you might get paid an allowance, for example. So quite often we know that if someone starts caregiving and they leave the workplace, there’s an agreement and we frame it. We even talk about it as, well, the main breadwinner will give you an allowance. ⁓

 

That can be constricted.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (43:50)

Because

 

it sounds controlling just by nature.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (43:55)

It does, but it’s also a conversation that people have. How are we going to live when we go from two incomes to one income? And so I think a healthy money relationship is saying, what’s my money? What’s your money? What’s our money? We don’t have that when we start ⁓ having conversations. We know young people are starting to talk more about what is consent in a sexual relationship.

 

How do you ask for it? How do you give it? How do you withdraw it? How do you check in? We’re not having the same financial consent conversation. What’s my money? What’s your money? What’s our money? How do we manage it?

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (44:36)

rooted in the talking money is taboo.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (44:40)

I think there’s many reasons, absolutely. you know, it’s part of, in some societies, some cultures, everyone’s very open about money. In some cultures, it’s very clear that this is a man’s role is to manage the money. And a woman’s role is to be the caregiver. And you know what? There’s nothing wrong with that. When it becomes problematic is when you’re not open about it.

 

Two people are not involved in the decision making, even if there is one decision maker, when you’re not transparent and when you’re not clear on how does this work, ⁓ when there is secrecy, where there is deceit and where there is control. And so some of those early warning indicators could look like ⁓ I’m having to ask for money all the time.

 

And I’m feeling guilty about that. being shouted at. I’m being told you can’t spend money on these things. You don’t have that choice. I don’t know what accounts my name is on. I don’t know what debts there are in my name. There are much more. There are. You’ve spent money on that. ⁓ Now there is violence that’s related to that. And so actually that control that is

 

controlling you about how you’re going to spend money by ⁓ through ⁓ abuse or violence. So it’s all very much interrelated and obviously that’s a really serious example but I’ve you know.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (46:15)

And it’s not defined to any socioeconomic group, is it? Because this can be happening in the poorest of households and in the most financially sound of households.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (46:28)

Absolutely, and I hear it from mainly women, but women from every walk of life. ⁓ I think sometimes it can feel even more challenging for a victim survivor who is in a high-powered professional career living in the dream house where

 

actually behind closed doors, they’ve got no control over their money. They are acquiescing to every single whim ⁓ because they are walking on eggshells. And those women have described how it’s much harder for anyone to believe them because surely, that’s right. ⁓

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (47:13)

that couldn’t be happening.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (47:16)

But also people who are experiencing financial abuse are some of your best budgeters that you will ever find because they will make every cent count and every dollar account. So I think what I would say is you need to trust your gut. If this doesn’t feel right, if I don’t feel like I know or I’ve got choice in

 

what’s happening with the money and sometimes those choices are going to be really hard. Then that is an early warning sign. It’s a little bit like we, you might have heard the expression love bombing and coercive control. So financial abuse is a tactic of coercive control and coercive control is the pattern of behaviour that someone uses to control someone to make them do what they say.

 

⁓ It’s being outlawed all around Australia. Different governments are bringing in these laws and that’s because it is so corrosive and we know that unfortunately where there is coercive control it is a lead indicator of homicide.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (48:26)

And that point is a red flag. Different governments are bringing it in. Why can we not be Australia and bring in a blanket ruling?

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (48:38)

Yeah, thank you Federation. Yeah.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (48:40)

Federation is a little more problematic than train gauges not lining up between Sydney and Melbourne, isn’t it?

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (48:42)

You

 

Yeah, look, even in my Design to Disrupt paper that I looked at energy and water last year, because the laws are inconsistent across the country, it means that if a survivor flees from one state where an energy provider can get access to grants related to domestic abuse to help pay the energy bills, that’s not the same in other states.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (49:18)

And I appreciate all our listeners aren’t from Australia, but ⁓ just think of Australia as a whole bunch of different countries and that’ll kind of resonate because that’s the dynamic at play. Tell me, if I was to ask you, if you said to the average married couple whose name’s on the mortgage, how often would the female’s name be on the mortgage?

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (49:47)

I think these days most often that will be. quite housing is so expensive that quite often it takes two incomes to be able to purchase a house. What I would say and I’m going to get into feminine terms and conditions again. Exactly. It’s like we need a little ding. Let’s talk about that.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (50:07)

Yep

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (50:15)

So most mortgages are set up and it’s called joint and several liability. That’s the expression and the term that is in the contract. And so most mortgages are joint mortgages, joint facilities. What joint and several liability means is that you are both on the hook for 100 % of that loan. It’s not 50-50.

 

So it helps you buy the home, but it also means that if one person doesn’t pay, you are on the hook for 100%. And it’s not just mortgages, it is also a range of other debts as well. So it could be an energy account. We also know that it can be tax liabilities when you are a director of a company, for example.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (51:09)

So purely set up to protect the organisation with no consideration of the circumstances individuals might find themselves in.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (51:17)

Look, and I understand why. mean, obviously, I a mortgage.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (51:20)

It makes…

 

It’s problematic.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (51:25)

Yes, so there are ways that you can protect yourself against that. I would say if you take a look at your mortgages that joint and severally liable, you could potentially if you’re going for a new mortgage or a new home loan, you could ask for what other structures, what other ways could we structure this? And there are a number of different ways you can do that. There are there’s one called tenants in common, means which is quite often a business.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (51:53)

Kind of

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (51:55)

Yeah, that’s right. And that one offers a different way of structuring it. So you could say, well, this person’s on the hook for 70 % and this person for 30%. You need to think about all of these. And I would encourage people to look at the options. Then also, if you have got that, a lot of people will have offset accounts. So they’re trying to reduce the amount of interest. And we know with the current climate that ⁓

 

where interest rates are fluctuating, that it’s a really good idea to try and pop some money into an offset account to try and reduce the interest. A number of banks are now introducing separate offset accounts and multiple offset accounts. So what I’ve seen in my work is that at the point of separation or before, ⁓ which is where financial abuse can start or get worse because it can happen.

 

for a long time after the relationship has ended, those joint accounts, like offset accounts or redraws, can be cleaned out. And you might have been putting all this money into that joint offset account and then all of a sudden that’s all gone. you’re left with 100 % of your home loan to pay. So a number of banks now have multiple offsets. So you could have one in your name and one in your partner’s name. And that money,

 

is yours and it’s both going to reduce their interest and so if it’s healthy all hunky dory but if the worst happen

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (53:29)

You’ve got the safety valve. That’s a terrific idea. Such simple strategies. I guess it comes down to, Catherine, everything’s great while it’s great. This is the, know, how many marriages end up in divorce scenarios. And everything’s often good until you start talking about money. having

 

these types of structures, even when everything is terrific, is a great forward thinking strategy of responsibility to each other.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (54:08)

Yeah, and financial independence because money gives you choices. And ⁓ if you’re having a conversation about what’s mine, what’s yours, what’s ours, how are we going to do this together? That’s fantastic. And you’re right. No one goes into a relationship where it’s abusive straight away, right? It happens over time. so ⁓ my view is that you need to just ask some simple questions. I’m launching a

 

podcast to give people some practical financial safety tips, which is really exciting. And it’s because we, you know, even when you’re setting up your apps on your phone and your technology, a lot of us, if you’re like me and a Gen X, this is all still new. Are these apps tracking me? Can you track me? ⁓

 

Can I just switch that off? Do I need that tracking system on, for example? Can someone else see ⁓ into my account? Do they need to? Can I switch it off? There’s a whole lot of different safety ⁓ protections that maybe we don’t know about. And they don’t have to be part of a scary conversation about, what happens if this relationship separates or if there’s abuse in it? It’s actually just, my view is financial safety. ⁓

 

is and tech safety are as important as financial and digital literacy. In fact, it’s the new form of literacy.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (55:36)

Absolutely. And you just pointed out you’re a Gen X and I’m on the cusp and I actually fall into the baby boomers. So for all of the baby boomers listening, this is about being ahead of the game and about being aware. So it’s invaluable. So Catherine, what else is in the pipeline for you for 2026 in terms of this incredible work that you are doing to… ⁓

 

put in some safeguards both into organisations and awareness for individuals around many of these issues that we’ve touched on today.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (56:13)

Well a couple of things, we’re launching the Design to Disrupt podcast.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (56:18)

Which

 

will be… Yes.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (56:21)

Yep,

 

and that is really practical financial safety tips. Here’s how you can set up your bank accounts, your telephone accounts, energy accounts, water accounts, your ⁓ technology accounts to be safe and to protect both you and your money. ⁓ This year we’ve launched the Financial Safety Alliance which is a partnership between Flequity and ⁓

 

a number of finance sector industry associations and we’re helping to build some resources around safer design that can be consistently applied across ⁓ banks and lenders, whether they’re buy now pay later products for example or banking products and also with the credit bureaus as well. So we’ll be working on that and I’m intending to continue to speak

 

to anyone and everyone who will listen about what is financial abuse, what is safety by design and financial safety by design because I believe that we all have a role to play. And so I’m really grateful to you, Di, for asking me to explain what is financial abuse and what can you do about it as an individual but also from an organisational perspective.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (57:44)

I’m eternally grateful to you for the work that you have done to date and for the work that you continue to do because I typically wrap up a podcast and say, can we find you? Well, FLEQUITY Ventures, and we’re going to put that link into the show notes because that will then take somebody to your podcast once it’s live too. Will that be the case? They’ll find that.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (58:09)

Yes it will. Yes it will. And the other thing I would say is that if you want to be a feminard like me, I’m

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (58:17)

You’re going to need magnifying glasses because there’s a lot of small print.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (58:22)

There is but what I have done is on the respect and protect website you can go to the page that says the fine print and you can take a look and see if any of the organizations you do business with are listed there. We’ve listed the financial abuse terms so you can read them and see them.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (58:43)

Be one of your podcast episodes, The Fine Print.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (58:47)

The fine pig, great idea. Thank you.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (58:49)

That’s a perfect one because that’s where so many are tripped up. We’re caught out by the fine print. that’s my marketing tip today.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (59:01)

Awesome. I was also wondering how many people would wear a cap or a t-shirt saying feminine ⁓ Maybe not as many I don’t mind self-identifying

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (59:11)

Yeah, I think that’s harder to sell just quietly, but you know, it depends. Maybe there’s a generation coming through the Gen A’s probably think that’s absolutely cool, but I don’t know that they want to identify as any badgers, so maybe not, I don’t know. But seriously, for our listeners, this is the type of episode that I would really implore that you do share, because this is

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (59:17)

Ha

 

That’s very true. That’s very true.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (59:40)

This is great for parents to share with their children, for you to share with your friends, friendship network, or if you feel somebody… ⁓

 

is in a situation where something just doesn’t count. might be an easy way to actually approach a conversation that’s more difficult and say, listened to this, you might take something from it, this is what I took from it. So I would really encourage somebody to think through that lens. The podcast is available on all of the podcast platforms, both audible and on YouTube, so easily shared.

 

very much look forward to your podcast going live as well, Catherine, because the informative nature of that is the core fundamentals that we really all need to hear and help us put in all of the systems into place. Personally, I have to declare I live in a household where my husband said to me 20 years or 21 years ago when we got married, you’re captain of the ship. And I’ve taken that literally and I have taken control.

 

but I personally don’t make any financial moves without full disclosure so that we are both informed on the decisions even though I might be taking the action.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (1:01:06)

which is absolutely a healthy money relationship. Go you Di

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (1:01:11)

Thank

 

you, thank you. But I do like being the captain of the ship.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (1:01:15)

Yeah.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (1:01:18)

Just quietly.

 

CATHERINE FITZPATRICK [GUEST] (1:01:20)

Sounds like he likes it too, so that’s pretty cool.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (1:01:25)

Let’s leave it that way. Catherine, thank you for your time and fabulous for the listeners. Thank you for joining us. Until next time.

 

Chapters:

00:00 Understanding Financial Abuse and Its Impact

03:00 The Weaponization of Financial Products

05:55 The Role of Institutions in Preventing Abuse

09:04 Real-Life Examples of Financial Abuse

12:00 Designing Systems for Safety

14:47 Shifting Organizational Mindsets

17:57 Innovative Solutions and Reforms

20:54 The Future of Financial Safety

32:13 The Role of Translators in Financial Safety

33:11 Men Stepping Up: A Shift in Support

34:52 Understanding Financial Abuse and Its Impact

42:09 Recognizing Early Warning Signs of Financial Abuse

49:47 Navigating Joint Financial Responsibilities

54:34 Building Financial Safety and Independence

56:04 Future Initiatives for Financial Safety Awareness

 

Connect with Di:

Connect with Di on LinkedIn

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Contact Di

 

Find Catherine at:

Websites
https://flequity.au/

https://catherinefitzpatrick.com/

LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/catherine-fitzpatrick-designedtodisrupt/

Instagram https://www.instagram.com/catherinefitzpatrick.official/

 

This is the home of unapologetic conversations and powerful stories of reinvention. New episodes drop every Monday to fuel your week with insights on leadership, resilience, and success. Subscribe and join a community of women who are changing the game.

 

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Disclaimer:  https://powerofwomen.com.au/podcast-disclaimer/

Are Women the Future of Politics?

Are Women the Future of Politics?

In this episode of the Power of Women podcast, Di Gillett interviews Kellie Sloane, the leader of the Liberal Party of New South Wales. The conversation is centred around the evolving role of women in politics.

Kellie with her optimistic outlook, embodies the spirit of resilience and strength that many women bring to the political arena. The conversation delves into the reasons behind this shift, emphasising the growing expectation for accountability and higher standards from leaders.

With a significant representation of women and younger voices in her team, Kellie believes that the political landscape is shifting towards a more inclusive and balanced environment.

This conversation serves as a powerful reminder of the impact women are having in politics today.

 

➡️You’ll Hear :

Why community must come first

Leadership lessons from crisis

Why voters value empathetic leadership

Why Kellie believes that kindness is a strength in leadership

The importance of bipartisan cooperation

How diversity in politics brings different perspectives to public policy

Why integrity is non-negotiable.

 

Key Takeaways:

  • Voters value empathetic leadership
  • Kindness is not weakness
  • There is rise of women across the political spectrum
  • Bipartisan cooperation is healthy
  • We need a strong opposition to hold the Government of the day to account.
📖 Read the full transcript of this conversation here.

FULL TRANSCRIPT:

DI GILLETT [HOST] (00:04)

Kellie when you hear the words power of women, what comes to mind?

 

KELLIE SLOANE MP [GUEST] (00:09)

and optimism and all my girlfriends and just generations of great energy.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (00:15)

Leadership is tested most clearly at moments of disruption. And when we’re talking about politics, women are at the center of that shift. I’m Di Gillett and this is the Power of Women podcast. And what I love about this platform is the opportunity to showcase and celebrate the strength, resilience and achievement of women from all walks of life. Today, I am joined by Kellie Sloane, leader at the Liberal Party of New South Wales.

 

and in fact one of the most consequential figures in state politics right now. Kellie leads at a moment when expectations of political leadership are changing, greater accountability, deeper scrutiny and higher standards. And as the events of December 2025 in Bondi Beach in Australia revealed, at a time when we have never experienced such volatility in the community.

 

Callie has spoken publicly about issues left to the margins. Men’s health, Australia’s declining birth rate, economic participation, infrastructure, and importantly, access to healthcare. And only a few weeks ago, she announced a new shadow ministry, positioning her team as government ready as we approach 2027. This is a conversation about why women are changing politics.

 

At a time when change is a daily headline. Kellie Sloane, welcome to the Power of Women podcast.

 

KELLIE SLOANE MP [GUEST] (01:47)

Thank you, Di. It’s so great to be with you.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (01:50)

Great to see you, Kellie. And for those listening who feel somewhat disillusioned by politics, we’re trying to put pay to that in today’s conversation. Kellie, love to reveal a backstory of where somebody’s come from and what brings them to current day. You’ve built an incredibly successful career outside politics. Why the shift and why now?

 

KELLIE SLOANE MP [GUEST] (02:18)

first job was as a journalist, a television journalist. I worked for Channel 9 primarily for about 14 years. And I had the great privilege of standing with people in moments of crisis, moments of loss, and moments of opportunity and celebration. And in those moments, there was a real privilege in reporting on that, telling their stories. But I guess I increasingly got frustrated by

 

The fact that I couldn’t play an active role in the change that I wanted to see. So telling their story was important, but being an active participant in the change that I wanted to see in our community became something that was really motivating for me. So I left journalism and moved into the not-for-profit sector.

 

worked with Life Education was the CEO of that organization and your listeners might be familiar with Healthy Harold, the giraffe. That was the icon of that organization. Got me deeply involved in policy around children’s and young people’s health, their mental health, their physical health. So I started to get an itch to do more. And I guess there was a point where I thought,

 

You know, I’ve told people stories, I’ve advocated for them. Now let’s jump in and see if I can make an even bigger difference in politics. And here I am.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (03:37)

Fantastic. And I know there is a personal cost in stepping forward into public life and in particular in politics. And I know a lot of people would wrestle with what that looks like. How have you come to terms with that part of the decision to step up into politics?

 

KELLIE SLOANE MP [GUEST] (03:57)

I have my eyes wide open, have to say, having covered politics for so long as a journalist and interviewed lots of prime ministers and engaged with the political process. So I knew that going into it, it would be tough. And I had to be okay with that. I had to be okay with giving up a level of privacy, giving up a lot of family time, because as a member of parliament, people probably don’t realize that you’re up very early and you’re going to

 

community events every night, which is really terrific. And I really enjoy that part of the role, but it means less time with friends, less time with family. And so guess I’m, you know, had that chat with my husband and our boys, our boys are now teenagers. So they understood and they were very supportive. And so I’m really lucky to do that. And can I say, I have to say there’s so much more that’s positive about this role than negative and

 

I thought there would be a greater deal of skepticism, a greater deal of anger, a greater deal of hate. And I have to say, I’ve been pleasantly surprised by the warmth in the community. People who were inclined to vote for me, people who won’t vote for me, who have said, you know, we really respect what you do and what you’re putting your hand up for. So I think we have in Australia that healthy skepticism of politics and politicians, understandable. But there’s also a lot of people who say, thanks for what you’re doing.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (05:18)

Kellie, was there ⁓ a political figure either in Australia or globally who has influenced your decision to step forward or in fact your views?

 

KELLIE SLOANE MP [GUEST] (05:31)

strong strength and inspiration from a variety of different figures. Sometimes they’re very different. As an example, if you were to go back a number of decades, Margaret Thatcher, who had this steely determination even when opposed and just pushed through based on her values. I find that incredibly inspiring. But on the other hand, someone entirely different, like Jacinda Ardern in New Zealand, whose policies I may not agree with, but I really respect her for showing a

 

kind of leadership that really resonates with me. One that says that kindness is a strength and not a weakness. And then I also in more recent times and closer to home, Gladys Berejiklian, who, you know, through COVID really steered our state, gave us ⁓ comfort. And that came through her diligence and her work ethic. And I really admire that too. And she’s someone I check in with from time to time to get a bit of advice.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (06:30)

that’s wonderful, having mentors. I found this wonderful little booklet the other day in memorabilia from my late father who was also a state politician for a short period. And it’s a little book for 30 cents that says quotations from the chairman Henry Bolte. Now none of them are repeatable because they’re almost all sexist, but it’s the most hysterical little booklet that ⁓ probably should be in the political archives now that I…

 

KELLIE SLOANE MP [GUEST] (06:59)

Yeah

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (07:00)

Yeah, incredible one. So on more serious note, Kellie, ⁓ we were really shaken in December 2025 with the tragedy at Bondi and you were front and centre at that event. What did that moment clarify for you about leadership?

 

KELLIE SLOANE MP [GUEST] (07:26)

I had been the opposition leader for less than three weeks ⁓ when the terrorism attack happened at Bondi Beach. I’m also the local member for that area and I was nearby at a separate Heineken celebration about to deliver a speech. I was standing on stage when the crowd started running and the place ended up in lockdown and I went to find out what was happening for my own safety. ended up having to jump into a

 

what’s called a Hatsola ambulance. was a community ambulance and the driver said there’s been a shooting at Bondi. My colleague has been shot. I’m going down there and I said, well, look, I’m coming with you. And we tore down to Bondi, arrived within minutes and as the shots were still being fired but was finishing up and we ended up parked under that bridge.

 

⁓ not knowing that the gunmen were above us still wrestling with the police and I went in ⁓ as did the ambulance driver and we attempted to help people and

 

In terms of what, you know, the moment of clarity from that, I think it’s something I always knew that community and all our decision-making community must come first, their safety, their, you know, a sense of bipartisanship was really important to me in the days and weeks after that attack that I felt it was very important to be working with the government to make sure that we were providing the resources locals needed, that we were there in lockstep when it came.

 

to supporting their grief, attending funerals, attending memorials, ⁓ an incredibly difficult time, incredibly difficult time and moments that I will certainly never forget my entire life.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (09:20)

How do you manage your own mental health having been fronted, etc. and then try and make clear headed decisions as part of that experience?

 

KELLIE SLOANE MP [GUEST] (09:32)

You know, I guess my answer is I just, really don’t know because there’s no one, there’s no textbook that can tell you how to manage that. So I think you draw on your own resolve and there are moments I’ll admit where, you know, I find it incredibly tough. And those moments often hit me out of the blue where I’ll stop and there’ll be just intense sadness. And I’ve talked with some of the other people that were there. ⁓

 

in the immediate aftermath of that shooting, the other first responders. I’ve got a lot of comfort talking to people like our surf lifeguards and lifesavers. We all went through that together and I find great comfort in that. And then I also feel, you know, it’s been important for the community that they knew I was there, that I understand and that I’m motivated only to support them.

 

in everything that I do. But I need, you know, it’ll be an ongoing process for anyone that was there. And in fact, even, you know, community members who weren’t there, but are feeling that secondhand trauma. And this is going to be a long process of healing and recovery for the community. I just have to channel those very real emotions I have into making sure that the decisions I make are empathetic, that they are putting people first.

 

that politics doesn’t come into it when we’re dealing with a national tragedy. But that I feel I’ve shared something with the community and in some ways that’s helped me because we all feel so helpless. it’s, yeah, exactly.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (11:19)

point of connection. Changing tack if we may. ⁓ Politics has been criticized and probably fairly so for toxic cultures up on the hill and outdated power dynamics. What’s your experience been?

 

KELLIE SLOANE MP [GUEST] (11:41)

I understandably politics has had a bad rap, politicians have had a bad rap. A lot of the people who observe through their TVs and online ⁓ feel like some politicians are in it for themselves, that they’re out of touch. And I understand all of that. My experience has actually been a pretty positive one. I entered parliament only three years ago. I think a lot of work had been done by my predecessors in terms of

 

calling out some of the bad behavior and addressing it. And in New South Wales Parliament, the Liberals Party Room is ⁓ almost half made up of women here. And we have a lot of young people. There are 10 millennials in our group. So we have a really balanced ⁓ party room. And I think that helps as well. There used to be a culture of a lot of drinking in Parliament, when there were the late night sittings. That just doesn’t happen anymore.

 

So I feel like it’s been incredibly positive that that doesn’t mean there’s not a lot of work to be done. But perhaps we’re also fortunate in New South Wales maybe compared to federal parliament where there might be bigger Stouches and maybe bigger Egos.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (12:55)

You may well be right. You may well be right. So Kellie, ⁓ do women in politics need to operate like the boys or is there an opportunity to elevate leadership and lead by example?

 

KELLIE SLOANE MP [GUEST] (13:12)

Maybe in the past they had to be a bit like the blokes. Look, I have to say though, there is an appetite for empathetic leadership. ⁓ Voters like voting for women because they see that we are pragmatic, that we are values-based, that we’re perhaps a little more consultative. By and large, a little less ego. ⁓

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (13:16)

federal mob.

 

KELLIE SLOANE MP [GUEST] (13:40)

And I say that as a broad sense, of course there are exceptions, but I believe when women bring their true selves to politics, when they are authentic, when they are speaking on behalf of communities, driven by their lived experience, that makes us powerful. And they are values and leadership qualities that the community is crying out for.

 

So that is where if we bring our authentic selves to the chamber, to our public life, that is why people are wanting to vote for us. I think gone are the days of having to be like the boys to compete with the boys. These days, women are valued for the qualities they bring. And that’s not to diminish the values of men either and the qualities that they bring that are sometimes different. We work best when we’re in partnership.

 

And we have a variety of different skills. you know, I, but I do think that these days leadership isn’t about being combative. Leadership is not about clashes in the chamber. Leadership isn’t about opposing for the sake of opposing. True leadership in my mind is about reaching consensus, putting people at the heart of every decision you make and bringing your authentic self.

 

the life that you’ve lived into public life. And when you do that, people resonate with that. And I think that’s very positive for politics and public life.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (15:16)

And may that resonate beyond politics into every boardroom around the country because they’re great values. Thank you, Kellie.

 

You’re listening to The Power of Women podcasts and I’m talking with Kellie Sloane, Liberal Leader for New South Wales in Australia. And coming up, we’re going to explore if women lead differently.

 

If you’re loving the Power of Women podcasts, be sure to jump onto our YouTube channel and hit that subscribe button to ensure you never miss an episode. Kellie, the rise of women across the political spectrum and including the Teals has really disrupted that traditional pathway to power. In your view, does gender matter in politics?

 

KELLIE SLOANE MP [GUEST] (16:07)

Gender matters only in so much as it brings different perspectives into the chamber and into the development of public policy. I equally think that diversity of cultures and experience, ⁓ geographies is as important as well. So where we have almost half of our party room in New South Wales is females, so that’s a really good thing, but I’d like to see more diversity in terms of experience and upbringing and background as well. And that’s something that we have to consistently work on.

 

And I think if we have more voices at the table testing our ideas, challenging our ideas, that is really healthy for democracy.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (16:45)

That’s the ultimate boardroom, isn’t it? Testing and challenging. like that very much. Kellie, how do you actually describe your leadership style?

 

KELLIE SLOANE MP [GUEST] (16:55)

I like to think of myself as an empathetic leader, that I will be bipartisan when it matters, bring people together, but equally I can be tough. But I can be tough in the same breath as being kind. And I think, I hope that’s the kind of leadership that I’m bringing that people see in me. That someone who will always seek solutions before combat. ⁓

 

but that when the government needs to be held to account and when we have better ideas, we will forcefully prosecute those ideas. ⁓ So tough but kind. I hope that’s what people see in me.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (17:37)

We like that very much. you’re, am I right in saying would be the third liberal leader for, female liberal leader for New South Wales Parliament? was someone who preceded Gladys previously was there?

 

KELLIE SLOANE MP [GUEST] (17:55)

So

 

there was Christina Keneally ⁓ was a female premier. ⁓ And then look, we’ve had a long history though of women in the New South Wales Parliament. The first woman and her name was Millicent Preston Stanley was elected 100 years ago. And she was also the member for the Eastern suburbs. And she was a firebrand conservative woman, right? And she got into that parliament with all the blokes and she advocated strongly.

 

⁓ for women to have access to their kids in divorce, ⁓ a whole lot of social issues. That’s Incredibly groundbreaking and quite inspiring. So ⁓ we’ve had a long line of conservative women in politics. ⁓ But yeah, until sort of the last couple of decades, not as many women as we might have liked.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (18:31)

at that time.

 

Yeah, so if you look to more recent times, what do you think are the most significant changes women have brought to the fore over the last decade?

 

KELLIE SLOANE MP [GUEST] (19:00)

think women in leadership have made us feel safe in times of crisis. ⁓ I’m thinking particularly about Gladys Berejiklian as the New South Wales Premier during COVID, her work ethic, her diligence, turning up every day and we watched her on the TV every day looking at those numbers. That was an incredible strength and comfort to the people of New South Wales.

 

I also think that we have demonstrated more broadly, ⁓ females in leadership everywhere, that sort of willingness to bring people together to find solutions, ⁓ that understanding of community and the value of community and decision making. And there are plenty of blokes who recognise that as well, but women bring a different voice to it sometimes. And we bring an experience of

 

I guess raising families, the challenges of paying the bills, the juggle that we bring. And often, I think my observation has been whether it’s women who ⁓ have achieved ⁓ significant promotions in business as CEOs or in media like yourself or have gone into politics, we’re often really ready for those roles because

 

It’s a problem that we doubt ourselves so much in the lead up to it. We’ve had to work so hard to overcome so many things or juggle so many things, family and work and the mental load and all the rest of it. That by the time we jump into big roles, we battle hardened, we’re ready, we know how to juggle, we know how to prioritize and we know how to get the job done with as little messing around as possible.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (20:45)

think if you look forward to the Millennials who are in your rooms, do you think they’ll be having these same conversations about women at the table as we are or do you think it will have been put to bed by this?

 

KELLIE SLOANE MP [GUEST] (21:01)

I have to say we don’t even talk about it in our party room ⁓ as an issue. In fact, I stood up when I announced my first shadow cabinet and all my new shadow ministers. One of the journalists asked me, what’s the gender makeup? And I had to stop. And I can honestly tell you, I had not even thought about gender. And afterwards I reflected on that and thought,

 

That’s pretty good that we’re not talking about it in our party room. And I wish that for our federal colleagues and for other party rooms. But the conversations that we’re having are not about whether you have ovaries or not. They’re about how can we help families ⁓ get ahead? How can we help young female entrepreneurs succeed and get rid of the red tape? How can we provide more flexible work and home solutions so that women can get ahead without having to put family last?

 

⁓ They’re the conversations that we’re having. Women have told me, business women that I’ve met with, that they want better economic conditions, they want ⁓ better workplace laws, they want less government interference, they want to make sure that transport infrastructure is being developed so that they can get home faster.

 

And these are all things that Liberal governments have done successfully over the last few terms and will continue to advocate for in our policies.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (22:22)

Yeah, fantastic. So, March 2027 is approaching at a rate of knots. It is. And you’ve described your new shadow ministry as government ready. What would you like your constituents to understand around what that actually means?

 

KELLIE SLOANE MP [GUEST] (22:42)

Well, it means that we’ve got an incredible team ⁓ of former government ministers who know how government works, who have that experience that’s really important. But equally, we have a group of young people coming through that understand the real concerns of young families and communities who know where the state’s heading, not just where it’s been. And I think that that mix in our party room is incredibly important.

 

And we are all inspired by our predecessors who built an incredible legacy in New South Wales of transport infrastructure, of metros, of new hospitals, ⁓ and that we want to be ambitious for our state too. So we will be an ambitious team with great experience, ready to govern, and ready to ⁓ remind families in New South Wales who are finding it really tough that there is a better way forward.

 

because right across our country, cost of living is declining, ⁓ government bureaucracy is growing, union influence is increasing and small businesses are closing at a rate of knots. So we will present a policy platform over the coming months that we hope will be hopeful, ⁓ that will be ambitious and that they’ll see in my team.

 

not just me as leader, as a capable leader and a future Premier, but a team that will be incredibly strong for New South Wales.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (24:08)

Yeah, wonderful. Kellie, I appreciate the first few weeks of your role were certainly ⁓ extraordinary. Outside of that, the shift to politics lived up to your expectations?

 

KELLIE SLOANE MP [GUEST] (24:28)

It’s probably exceeded my expectations. I have seen the power that can come from good opposition. So it’s not just about jumping in and trying to get into government. We have developed policy that the government has adopted from the opposition benches. That’s really satisfying. We’ve also produced amendments to government legislation that have succeeded.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (24:51)

And that’s what a good opposition does.

 

KELLIE SLOANE MP [GUEST] (24:53)

It’s so healthy for the state. I have equally worked in a bipartisan fashion with the government to get good legislation through and to make what I’ve thought is ordinary legislation better. ⁓ I want the Premier and his team, every time they produce a policy, to be looking over their shoulder saying, what would Kellie think? What would the opposition say about this?

 

and sure that they dot the I’s and cross the T’s and sharpen their pencils and make sure that they are delivering the best for New South Wales. So at the very minimum, my job is to make sure that we hold this government to account, that they become a better government because of a tough opposition. And at the very best, then I hope to be in office in a year from now. But I’ve been incredibly satisfied by the work we’ve done in parliament, but also I have to say,

 

You know, nothing prepares you just for ⁓ how much you care for your community as a local member of parliament. And I get incredible satisfaction out of the small community events, out of going down to the surf clubs, about speaking to locals and trying to make a difference on the everyday issues that matter to them. And it’s a real privilege. I have to say it’s an incredible privilege.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (26:08)

Kellie, I’ve got a couple of rapid fire questions to throw at you as we wrap up today’s conversation. One issue you believe politics has underestimated for too long.

 

KELLIE SLOANE MP [GUEST] (26:21)

Social cohesion, we’ve taken that for granted. We need to try harder. We cannot say she’ll be right when it comes to our multicultural communities.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (26:32)

And leaderships treat Australia needs more of right now.

 

KELLIE SLOANE MP [GUEST] (26:37)

at courage to make tough decisions even when they’re not popular. I think we need that right now. We can’t please everyone.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (26:46)

and one decision principle you’ll never compromise on.

 

KELLIE SLOANE MP [GUEST] (26:51)

Integrity. Yeah, you have to stick to your values. I want to leave politics with my integrity intact and hopefully that will serve me well while I’m in the job.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (27:02)

Yeah, fantastic. Kellie, what a ⁓ refreshing and resounding positive take on life in politics and what your views are. I commend you on that and thank you for that and I have no doubt you become a role model for other women considering a path in politics. I know I grew up

 

As a school kid, if you asked me what I wanted to be, for years it was a politician and somehow it fell off the radar and I commend you on making that decision because it is a huge sacrifice. You’re a wife, you’re a mother, you’ve got the role of opposition which I sometimes think is tougher than the role of leading and you are doing it with such grace and conviction. It’s so impressive.

 

KELLIE SLOANE MP [GUEST] (27:54)

Thank you, Di And can I just say we need women like you in politics. It is never too late to step up. Can I also say to your viewers and listeners that we need more people in politics, whether it’s front and centre like me, whether it’s behind the scenes, whether it’s joining parties, whether it’s my party, the Liberal Party or the Labor Party, have a voice, have a say, because we need more people contributing to our democracy right now.

 

valuing our democracy and making sure that we hold every politician to account. So ⁓ thank you and thank you for the community that you provide for women.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (28:29)

Thank you Kellie and thank you so much for joining me today. I know that the time of a politician is scarce and heavily scheduled so much appreciation. Until next time.

 

Chapters:

00:00 The Power of Women in Politics

02:21 Kellie Sloane’s Journey to Politics

04:52 Navigating the Challenges of Public Life

07:04 Leadership in Times of Crisis

12:55 Empathetic Leadership: A New Approach

15:16 Leadership Styles and Gender Dynamics

12:55 Empathetic Leadership: A New Approach

28:29 The Future of Women in Political Leadership

 

Connect with Di:

Connect with Di on LinkedIn

Follow Power Of Women on LinkedIn

Follow Di on Instagram

The Power Of Women Podcast Instagram

Contact Di

 

Find Kellie Sloane MP at:

Website https://kelliesloane.com.au/

LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/kellie-sloane/

Instagram  https://www.instagram.com/kelliesloanemp/?hl=en

 

This is the home of unapologetic conversations and powerful stories of reinvention. New episodes drop every Monday to fuel your week with insights on leadership, resilience, and success. Subscribe and join a community of women who are changing the game.

 

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Disclaimer:  https://powerofwomen.com.au/podcast-disclaimer/

Shame Caused by the Abuse of Power Must Be Redirected to the Perpetrators

Shame Caused by the Abuse of Power Must Be Redirected to the Perpetrators

Shame caused by the abuse of power. A brave conversation which does include references to child sexual abuse.

In this episode of the Power Of Women Podcast, Di Gillett speaks with Dr Martina Zangger about childhood abuse, the psychology of shame, and the long path to healing.

Growing up in Basel, Switzerland, Martina’s childhood appeared privileged. The reality was abuse by powerful men within her own family – men who were respected pillars of society. Men whom should know better, be better, do better.

Disclosure did not happen until she was 27.

We also hear about Martina’s extraordinary experience having spent a decade in the infamous Rajneesh cult in the United States.

Now a psychotherapist and author of Not My Shame, Martina’s life work focuses on shifting shame back to where it belongs. – to the perpetrators.

 

➡️You’ll Hear :

Why shame attaches to survivors.

The common traits of perpetrators.

Why disclosure often takes decades.

The psychology of cult power dynamics.

How women move from silence to authorship.

 

Powerful quotes from Dr Martina Zangger:

“I believe that shame must change sides.”

“It took until I was 27 to disclose the abuse.”

“We can heal and we will have relief from the damage of abuse.”

👉 Read the full transcript of this conversation here

FULL TRANSCRIPT_DR MARTINA ZANGGER

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (00:02)

So I believe that my purpose in life is to hold rage in one hand and hope in the other. And that gives me the energy to do the work I do. I walk along victims’ survivors on their journeys of healing. And I need that rage and hope to continue. Also, I believe that shame must change sides.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (00:31)

if shame was never yours to carry? And what if shame belongs unequivocally with those who cause harm, not with those who survive it? I’m Di Gillett and this is the Power of Women podcast. And what I love about this platform is the opportunity to showcase and celebrate the strength, resilience and achievements of women from all walks of life.

 

Through revealing lived experience, it becomes a chorus of wisdom that makes sure women are seen not just for what we do, but for who we are. But before I begin, and as Hannah Asafiri has so rightly pointed out on this podcast in previous episodes, life doesn’t come with a trigger warning. However, this episode includes references to sexual abuse, so please

 

take care whilst listening. And let’s start with this point today as we kick off the conversation because it’s not designed to shock, provoke, or re-traumatise. It is designed to reframe, to shift shame back to where it belongs, to talk about survival without sanitizing it, and to name patterns, particularly narcissistic abuse.

 

So hopefully women can see them sooner, trust themselves more readily, and hopefully, where possible, leave earlier. And speaking out can be a key part of healing, which is exactly what today’s guest is doing. Martina Zangger, welcome to the Power of Women podcast.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (02:14)

Thank you so much for having me Di

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (02:17)

Martina, I’m going to jump around a little bit today and we had a bit of a exploratory discussion before Christmas, before we decided to record this episode. And there are some dark aspects of this conversation, but there’s also such a richness of lived experience that I’d love to understand today. But I think what we need to do is frame the very beginning and

 

⁓ and allow our listeners to understand some context. Are you comfortable with us doing that?

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (02:54)

Yes very much so Di.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (02:56)

Okay, lovely. So I want to know about your childhood because from the outside, anybody looking at it, it would have looked safe, but the reality behind closed doors was a very, very different thing. Where did you grow up?

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (03:14)

So I grew up in a small town in Switzerland called Basel, which is on the German and French border in the north. I grew up in a well-to-do household with a mother and father and two older brothers. Everything looked normal, yet underneath it all, were very, very… ⁓ It was a dangerous childhood.

 

and there were terrible things happening in both in our home and in the home that I was left in, my grandparents’ home, many times, probably every two, three weeks for two or three days. And that was my grandparents’ home was where I was sexually abused by my grandfather and by my uncle.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (04:05)

What do you most want people to understand about that time, Martina?

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (04:11)

I think it’s really important to know that these were ordinary men. In fact, they were highly regarded citizens in our society, in the Swiss society. My grandfather was a high court judge and academic, and my uncle was a beloved politician and barrister. So they were well regarded men. They were men that were looked up to.

 

and yet behind closed doors they turned into something quite different.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (04:46)

and nobody would have had any idea and it would have been hard to actually be believed given their standing in the community.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (04:54)

Yeah, yeah, absolutely. And this is why it took such a long time for me to disclose it. It took until I was 27 to disclose the abuse. And it happened, it happened between age two and age six. Yeah.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (05:14)

And you’ve decided to now put pen to paper and you’ve written your memoir touching on this. Why now, Martina?

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (05:27)

I was really ready now because I had, in 2010 I had finished my PhD, which was on sexual assault and the legal system. I was teaching at Newcastle University and I was an academic there. And once I finished my PhD, I thought, I never wanna write an academic paper again. It’s so stifling.

 

we are straight jacketed as academics and we can’t say what we really want to say. And so after I finished my PhD, I became ready then to start creative writing, which is what I pursued then. I was still teaching, but I was no longer writing the PhD or journal articles that were academic yet.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (06:23)

What year did you land in Australia? Because you grew up in Switzerland. What year did you, did you immigrate?

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (06:29)

I

 

came to Australia in 1975 when I was 14 years old.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (06:34)

Okay, and we’ll come back because there’s a couple of moves there about that. But what actually triggered the immigration to Australia?

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (06:47)

So in my hometown Basel were all the big pharma factories. So there was Roche, Sandoz, Seabar, Guygee and all the people in that town worked for one of the big pharma companies. My dad worked for big pharma and he was ⁓ given a promotion to ⁓ lead the company in Australia and Asia.

 

and that is how we moved to Australia.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (07:21)

And was that break in moving countries the break in the abuse?

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (07:27)

Yes, it was, absolutely. Because at that time, I was no longer abused by my grandfather who had passed away or by my uncle who got married, but by a 17 year old who abused me for a couple of years between ages 12 and 14. And one of the big benefits of moving to Australia was that then the abuse stopped.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (07:55)

Okay, so there was a physical break point that allowed that to take place.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (08:05)

Yes, I it was amazing. I remember when my dad told us that we’re moving to Australia, my first thought was, my god, this is so great because I’m going to be free of the sexual abuse. Because I just did not know how to disclose it or how to be assertive and say to this guy, I don’t like it. I don’t want to see you anymore. I had no words. I was very unassertive.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (08:31)

Had you declared it to your parents?

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (08:34)

No, I didn’t declare it until I was 27.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (08:40)

and from the work that you have done post PhD and in your studies, I suspect that is not uncommon.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (08:51)

It’s absolutely the most common ⁓ time frame when victims disclose it takes on average 25 years. I’ve worked with women, I recently have worked with a beautiful ⁓ older lady who is 85 and she is seeing me for counselling because her father sexually abused her. She has never told anyone until she turned 85.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (09:20)

Go to heavens.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (09:21)

So it takes much courage and time before victim survivors can disclose.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (09:30)

So you referenced about this 85 year old woman that you’re coaching at the moment. I suspect her non-disclosure at an earlier age was purely a generational thing.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (09:46)

Not purely, because even now there are victims who will never disclose. Even now there are young children who will never ever disclose. And that is such a tragedy because if we don’t disclose, we can’t heal. Because we can’t heal in isolation. We heal when we tell someone and the other person believes us.

 

If we don’t tell, we can’t heal.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (10:17)

So are young children more or less inclined to disclose in current day by contrast to when you grew up?

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (10:27)

Yes, they are much more likely to disclose. And when I worked in sexual assault services in rural and regional New South Wales, had at least ⁓ two thirds of our caseload was children and adolescents. So there are more and more kids and adolescents disclosing much earlier because there’s more education in schools about ⁓

 

being safe about consent and about sexual abuse and what ⁓ sexual abuse actually is. So children are now more likely to disclose, however many still don’t.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (11:12)

So is that about awareness, not confidence? That is, the children are more aware, they’re not necessarily more confident, they’re just more aware?

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (11:22)

They’re more aware and they, if they have one safe person in their life, whether that’s mum or an auntie or a teacher or a best friend, they are more likely to disclose if they have a safe person in their lives. Yeah.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (11:42)

And you referenced off camera before about a particular Australian lawyer that you follow.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (11:49)

Yes, so I follow him on Instagram. He’s a Victorian lawyer and every day he posts the figures of child sexual abuse cases in court across Australia. And what he has found is that at least 25 % of all criminal cases that occur in courts across Australia are child sexual abuse cases.

 

which is just heartbreaking.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (12:20)

It absolutely is. And I suspect there are only the numbers that make it to court because somebody’s called it out. That doesn’t speak to the hidden abuse that is still ongoing or has taken place.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (12:35)

Yes, it’s

 

heartbreaking. But we’re doing much better education of kids, even little kids in preschools are getting information that they need so that they can disclose if anything ever happens to them.

 

which is wonderful.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (12:56)

It is, absolutely. Are we at risk that ⁓ an advanced thinking child might weaponize that or does that not happen?

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (13:08)

I it happens. Yeah, I don’t think that happens. ⁓ Maybe one in a hundred. I know I’ve worked as a sexual assault ⁓ psychotherapist for 28 years. I would have maybe five in that time, five clients where I thought something doesn’t add up. But that’s out of hundreds.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (13:10)

can go on.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (13:35)

So yes it may happen maybe less than 1 % would fall asleep.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (13:41)

shitty lawyer using using it as their their lame defense to the perpetrator.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (13:47)

Yes.

 

Or someone that’s extremely unwell or someone who perhaps has a mother that is coaching them to say that. But I need to stress that is less than 1%. Disclosures. People often say, I mean, they’re called, ⁓ you’re a liar. that’s liars are only less than 1%. Yeah.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (14:02)

Also. Yeah, okay.

 

extraordinary lot. I think we’ve put that one to bed. So looking at shame and we talked about shame in the introduction and I’d like to go there in some detail if we could. It’s one of the most persistent burdens that a survivor carries even though logically it should belong to the abuser not to the victim. Why

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (14:18)

Yeah.

 

Yes.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (14:46)

does it attach itself so strongly to the person who’s been abused rather than the perpetrator?

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (14:55)

Yeah, that’s such a tragedy because it keeps victim survivors silent. But it’s basically because the perpetrator uses power and control. The perpetrator always has more power. And therefore, they make the child or the young person or their wife or partner feel you are nothing, you are nobody, no one will believe you.

 

You are crazy and they themselves elevate themselves a bit like my grandfather and uncle. I am a pillar of society and no one will believe you. And that’s what I believed for 27 years. And it’s true, like some people did not believe me. Many people go, no, that can’t be true.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (15:48)

Were your perpetrators still alive when you called them out?

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (15:54)

My uncle was, my grandfather had died.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (15:58)

How does that sit?

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (16:00)

I will, I mean they have both passed away now and I feel freer for it and I feel happy that they can’t abuse any other kids. That’s the main thing I think. ⁓ I did confront my uncle, of course he denied it and perpetrators always deny it because the very thing that allows them to perpetrate abuse also allows them to lie.

 

and continue to try and use power over a victim survivor.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (16:33)

hence why it’s so difficult to shift that blame back to them from yourself. It really takes an intervention from somebody else to call it out and shift the blame.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (16:47)

Yeah, I remember when I was 20, I was probably 28 or 29, I decided I had this brainwave. I’d been in therapy for a couple of years and I said to my therapist, I’ve got a really great idea. I’m going to write to my uncle and confront him and then he’s going to say, sorry. And I believed that he would because I was still very naive and not as well informed as I am now. And she said,

 

let’s slow it down, I think we need to plan for this and think about it. But it was one of the times when I would not listen to her. I loved her, she was amazing, but I was like, no, I’m gonna do it. And I went home and I wrote that letter. We didn’t have email yet. I wrote the letter and I copied, made like, I think five copies for my parents, my aunt and my two brothers.

 

And I sent those to ⁓ those people and my uncle, I waited and waited for him to write back to me hoping he would say, I’m really sorry, I shouldn’t have done that. But of course he wrote back in his lawyerly ⁓ version of events saying, you have always been unstable. We know that you are crazy. You belong in a psychiatric hospital.

 

and I never touched a hair on your head. And if you continue to say this, I will prosecute you. And it sent me spiralling down for probably about six months. I was gutted. And I thought, you know, I went back to my therapist and I said, I should have listened to you. It was the worst idea for me to do that.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (18:41)

But did it then galvanise you after you hit rock bottom to go, I’m coming after you?

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (18:49)

It did, absolutely. Yeah, I got strong again, but it took a while.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (18:51)

yet.

 

I can imagine. And there’s no guarantee that you can bounce back from that. That is an awful, awful thing to experience. I’m so sorry. Yeah.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (19:06)

Thank you. I’m fine now.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (19:10)

Your strength in talking about this suggests that you’ve got the upper hand in this story now. So, but if at any time this feels uncomfortable, you let me know. So, yeah. So women listening who are carrying trauma, Martina, without going into the clinical depths, because I appreciate you are now well,

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (19:25)

I

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (19:39)

educated in this. Could you talk us through what healing tends to involve?

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (19:47)

Yeah, healing. ⁓ Healing involves, first of all, finding a safe person that will believe you and support you through the healing journey, who will walk alongside you, whether that’s a sister, a therapist, a mum, or an auntie, someone who is believing and supportive.

 

can be difficult for some people to find. Sometimes they have grown up in families where there is no safe person.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (20:25)

Is it a coincidence that you’ve called out only female profiles or is that how it always plays out in terms of finding that safe person? Could that-

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (20:37)

Yeah, of course it could. Of course it could. I should have said that. It may be a male therapist. It may be a brother. Yeah, absolutely. A best friend. Yeah.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (20:47)

Okay, yeah. I think it’s probably important that we share that that be the case. We’re not pointing the finger at all men. ⁓

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (21:03)

Many men are very, very supportive and for example my husband who I’ve been with for 35 years, he has been my greatest support and has always believed me and believed in me.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (21:19)

Yeah, there we go. That’s a powerful thing to point out.

 

So I’d like to talk in a little bit more depth about perpetrators and there’s growing awareness that many abusers share common traits, particularly narcissistic behaviors. And there’ll be a crossover in DV in this as well. When you look at the work that you’ve done, are there similarities

 

in how perpetrators operate.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (21:58)

there are definitely similarities and there, I’ve talked about this a little bit earlier, they enjoy using power and control. They do not have empathy for their victims and that allows them to continue to perpetrate abuse, whether that’s domestic violence or sexual abuse or homicide. know, women,

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (22:08)

They have.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (22:27)

I think last year 75 women were killed in Australia by partners or ex-partners. they have this in common that they, yes, they have not, they do not have empathy for their victims or for their victims loved ones who are also damaged of course.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (22:38)

Thanks.

 

And we’ve already seen those numbers start to rise for 2026 already. haven’t got our processes in place to keep everybody safe yet.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (22:54)

Absolutely.

 

No, no,

 

and we keep, you know, I’m on my soapbox a bit, we put, ⁓ for example, people who have addictions, who have stolen a car and ⁓ been speeding, we put them in jail for five years. We put perpetrators of sexual abuse in jail for 18 months, if that, for six months.

 

or we give them good behaviour bonds or we let them out early for good behaviour. So the consequences are not the same as they are for other crimes that are far less harmful to the population.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (23:46)

They’re

 

certainly not aligned to the gravity of what they have perpetrated against somebody else. It wouldn’t be uncommon for survivors to say, know, what drew them to me? Why me? Was this my fault? I suspect self-blame is a big part of what a victim faces.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (24:16)

Yes, self-blame is something I always challenge. And I know for me, I felt a lot of self-blame. I’m crazy, I’m unhinged. I was crazy because I was sexually abused. And once I dealt with it, I was not, I realized I’m not crazy. was just deeply, deeply traumatized. You know, there’s the victim blaming typical, what was she wearing? Why were you out?

 

Yes. I was wearing pink pyjamas. I was wearing nappies. People of any age can get sexually abused. They might be wearing ⁓ a hospital gown.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (25:06)

Do we victim blame? What is behind that?

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (25:08)

Because

 

we don’t want to know the truth about what happens behind closed doors. don’t want to, know, men still have the power. Men, we’re still living under a patriarchy where men have the power and we don’t, we’re scared to give women power. You know, it’s the, even the, the old story of Eve was made from Adam’s rib. No.

 

Adam was made from Eve’s womb. But we want to believe that it’s men that are the creators of everything, that are the powerful and smart ones.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (25:52)

That being said, are women ever the abusers?

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (25:58)

Yes, are. can ⁓ be.

 

Yes, a small percentage of abusers are women and I think it’s really important to say that and to be aware of that. I have worked with ⁓ hundreds of sexually abused children and adults and probably perhaps 3 % have been ⁓ girls and women that have abused those people. So 3 to 5 %

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (26:31)

than I thought. Yeah. It’s higher than I thought. Yeah. And is that also about power?

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (26:37)

Yes, it’s about power and control, same thing. Yeah. And it’s just as damaging ⁓ as if it was a boy or man.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (26:47)

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (26:50)

I know we’ve seen that in the news this week haven’t you? We have. female teacher.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (26:56)

Yes,

 

that’s what prompted my question. Yeah. You’re listening to the Power of Women podcast and I’m talking with Dr. Martina Zenger who is a victim of child sexual abuse. And coming up, we’re going to hear about how she ends up at the infamous Rajneesh cult in the US.

 

If you’re loving the Power of Women podcasts, be sure to jump onto our YouTube channel and hit that subscribe button to ensure you never miss an episode. Martina, many of my contemporaries will remember the Raj Nish movement and I do. was working in retail as a recent fashion graduate and I can remember this group of individuals.

 

constantly coming into my store, buying up everything that ever hit the racks that was in orange. And that was my first exposure. And it just seemed like this strange anomaly. But I remember the orange robes, I remember the Rolls Royces, and there was that infamous 60 minutes episode where one of the spokespeople for the cult said,

 

when challenged in an interview, they said tough titties and that was spoken by a woman. And that resonated and sticks in my mind from the time. And it was framed as a provocative counter-cultural, even a glamorous cult at that stage. I right in?

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (28:23)

Yes

 

Yes, was a bit like a rock star. He was a very infamous, charismatic rock star guru.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (28:47)

Mmm.

 

There’s going to be an intersection here in what we’ve talked about previously about narcissistic behavior. I would suspect, yeah. So you encountered the Raj Nish at 19. Could you talk us through that and what you were looking for that led to that encounter?

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (29:02)

Yes, very.

 

Yes.

 

Yes, so I had been very lost. I’d been to uni and dropped out in my first semester because I believed I was stupid, I can’t cope, I couldn’t handle adult life. I had no skills to handle adult life. So I was kind of drifting, working any job that I could get.

 

being a cleaner in a factory, working at Piermont fish markets, working as an assistant to a sports photographer, ⁓ working in a nursing home as an assistant in nursing, a sandwich hand. One job after another, ⁓ absolutely lost young woman between 17 and 19.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (30:04)

after another.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (30:13)

I then went and lived on a commune in the bush and I attended in Australia, yes. And at that commune, I attended a rebirthing workshop, which I wouldn’t really recommend people do. at that rebirthing workshop,

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (30:22)

Yeah.

 

even at saying that. mean we’ve seen more recent TV shows with Nine Perfect Strangers I think is the one that resonates in my mind now of how wrong that can go.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (30:50)

It

 

can go very wrong. I attended that workshop and I met a couple there who were Rajneeshis. They were wearing pink and red and purple and orange. They were wearing their necklaces, their beaded necklaces with the locket of his photo around their necks. And they gave me one of his books and that particular book was called My Way.

 

The Way of the White Clouds. And I read that book. They were going to, two days later they were travelling to America to live on his ashram, which was a 64,000 acre ashram in Oregon. Massive.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (31:38)

65,000 acre. I come from the country. I understand land math. That is enormous.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (31:43)

enormous, enormous. And so they looked so blissful. They were amazing. I just looked up to them, admired them, and I wanted what they had. I wanted that confidence, that smiling piece that detached happiness because I had none of that. So I devoured the book and

 

I devoured it in 24 hours and then decided I’m going to become a Rajneji too. And I moved back to Sydney to live near the ashram. They had an ashram in Darlinghurst. Yes, yeah, there was an ashram on the street.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (32:25)

is that right?

 

The

 

disenfranchised is such a successful strategy. There it is, laid bare.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (32:37)

Yes,

 

yes. I was so naive and I was such a needy young woman looking for, ⁓ looking to be saved by someone or something because I could not help myself.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (32:53)

Wow. And you then went to the US yourself?

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (32:58)

I did, yes, so I had to save up madly because you had to have, it was an expensive cult to be part of.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (33:07)

You had to sustain this huge acreage.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (33:10)

Exactly. So we had to pay $8,000 to be there for a year. And that year we’re in 1981. So that was a lot of money in 1981. There was no way I could save that up doing making sandwiches.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (33:22)

That’s all.

 

You’ve been doing all of these odd jobs

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (33:33)

Yes, so I met another Rajneeshi. She lived across the road from me in Darlinghurst and she said, yes, I said to her, I need to make money because I want to go and live over there, which all of us wanted to do. That was the Holy Grail to live with him. And she said, ⁓ I’ve got a really great idea for you. I work in a brothel.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (33:41)

I they even existed.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (34:02)

and they’re always looking for people. It’s the easiest job in the world. Why don’t you try it? And I thought, yep, I’m going to do it. She said, you can make $500 a night. And that was in 1981.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (34:18)

The price of sex, it’s an expensive pursuit.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (34:22)

Yes. I went the next day for an interview and I was a real hippie. I didn’t wear makeup. had, I remember the ⁓ guy who interviewed me, he was a lovely gay guy and he said, just take off your clothes. Let me have a look at you. Cause I was wearing like baggy. ⁓ And I took my clothes off and I remember I was wearing like really sad, baggy cotton undies.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (34:43)

Big deal.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (34:52)

And he just shook his head. He goes, you’ve got to go and go next door and buy some really nice lingerie from, what was it called? ⁓ It’ll come to me. It was a really fancy, ⁓ the house of Maryvale. It was a few doors down in Pitt Street, yeah, in the city of Sydney.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (35:08)

Good heavens. Yes. It was next door to the house.

 

Angel Bar, House of Maryvale, right in the centre of town. Those who aren’t necessarily from Australia or Sydney-siders, the positioning of that is like centre of town anywhere in the world.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (35:22)

Right in the center. ⁓

 

center

 

of town exactly. And so he said go and get yourself some lingerie and this will be your uniform and you can start tomorrow.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (35:46)

Mind you, that is bloody expensive lingerie for somebody with no money who’s had odd jobs and is trying to look good for a stranger. mean… ⁓

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (35:57)

Absolutely, it killed my bank account. Yeah

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (36:01)

I have no doubt.

 

There’s so many things wrong with that story, Martina. It’s like… So many things wrong with it.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (36:08)

you

 

Yes, so I started working there the following day. I was scared but so desperate to get to America, to the Guru that that overrode everything. It overrode my sense of this is dangerous, I’m scared.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (36:35)

So how long did you work at the brothel before you made that money?

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (36:41)

Yeah, so I worked there for 18 months. I could have saved it up much quicker, but I then went on spending sprees because having all that money was so, it was so infectious and addictive that I would, you know, I would see a purple satin maxi dress halter neck and go, I want that. And I would buy it at the house of Maryvale.

 

⁓ I was having expensive hairdos and I was all of that stuff because I was young and silly. I wanted those things. So that’s why it took much longer than it should have. I was sending 10 to 20 percent of my income to the ashram, ⁓ which was what we were, it was tithing. It was tithing a bit like in churches where you tithe 10 percent of your income.

 

So that also drained the funds significantly. And I did workshops, I did these stupid Rajneesh workshops that were supposed to heal us. And they were expensive too. So yes, took a bit longer than I…

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (38:02)

So what year did you land at the ashram?

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (38:07)

I

 

think it was 1982. 1982, yes.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (38:10)

Yeah, right

 

What a very different contrast in what I was doing to the journey you were going through. But so many people be able to put a line in the sand and say, what did my life look like at that point in time? And it’s such a contrast. So you got there in 1982. How long before the penny dropped that this whole thing was a ruse?

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (38:38)

Yeah, look, unfortunately it took eight whole years and it’s a bit like a bad marriage. I stayed in it hoping that things would get better. I stayed because I was committed to this path, this spiritual path that I believed would heal me. I believed that if I was on this path, I never had to

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (38:50)

in beta.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (39:07)

deal with my past with the sexual abuse, I would just be magically healed by the Guru and by the

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (39:14)

Did it ever come up in any of your workshops? it ever?

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (39:17)

It did actually, but then I would just push it down. I would push it down very quickly. I did. You did. I did, yeah. And they, I mean, they would have too, but I would come up and I would just say, no, don’t talk about it.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (39:23)

You did all they did.

 

Yeah. Do you know why?

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (39:39)

Shame. Again, was the shame. I’m dirty. I’m damaged goods. I’m a mess. I’m fucked up.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (39:47)

Yeah.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (39:49)

Yeah,

 

I wanted to be this spiritual shiny girl.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (39:54)

Yeah. So how did you, what was the tipping point to say this is not right and how did you extract yourself from that incredibly powerful hold that they had over you? Yeah.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (40:11)

So when I first got there I was so excited but very quickly I realized things are not ⁓ gonna be as I imagined them to be. So I was driven by a lovely Rajneesh man to my new home which was a little cute, the cutest little A-frame.

 

wooden A-frame and I just thought my god I’m going to be so happy here. But when I went into the A-frame I realised I had to share it with two other people. It was a tiny room, a tiny room with three mattresses on the floor with hardly any room to between the mattresses to walk and that was my home for 18 months and we had to work seven days a week

 

12 hours a day, there was no day of rest, no day for fun. ⁓ And I worked as a member of the pipe crew, was called the pipe crew, was, we were digging ditches in the desert, the Oregonian desert. And the ditches were like quite thin ditches and we laid irrigation pipes.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (41:29)

I was going to say you were doing the work to sustain the property.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (41:34)

Absolutely. We growing all the vegetables, all the fruit, all the trees. And I was shocked that I was so shocked. It was a hard job. Like digging with a pickaxe is really hard. A pickaxe and a shovel. So yes, it was a…

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (41:55)

He

 

was on to a good thing while it lasted. Bloody hell! Yeah!

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (42:01)

And the reason I finally left there, I just want to add one thing before that. He was at that time in silence, so he didn’t speak. He used to give sermons, but he had stopped speaking publicly because he said, I’ve said everything I need to say and I’m tired of talking, so I’m not talking. instead of talking.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (42:25)

Before

 

I’m gonna get myself into more litigious shit if I keep going

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (42:31)

Yes, absolutely. So at that time, we only saw him at what was called drive-by, which was he would drive past us in one of his 84 Rolls Royces every day after lunch. And we would line up on the side of the road. 2,000 followers would line up with our hands in namaste and wait for him to drive by and

 

look at us and wave at us and we would jump up and down, we would play musical instruments and be so excited to see him.

 

Yes.

 

Adoring. Thank God it ended. eventually he went back to India because he was deported from America. He went back to India to his original ashram and I went there three times in the time that I was part of the Rajneesh movement. The third time I went

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (43:39)

Is that what happened?

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (43:58)

there was a really tragic event which actually allowed me to leave him and break up with the cult. And that was that his girlfriend, he had had this girlfriend called Vivek, a beautiful, beautiful English woman who had been his girlfriend since she was 18. She was the person I most aspired to be.

 

I thought she was the luckiest woman alive because she lived with him. She was always in the Rolls Royce with him in the front seat, the passenger seat. And yet there was a deep unhappiness in her and she actually died by suicide while I was there in India. The poor, poor woman. And he ⁓ told us we were not allowed to go to the funeral. She had done the most…

 

the most ⁓ gutless thing anyone could do and we would not speak about her again. is how he framed it. And that woke me up. just went, I am so angry that no one has compassion for this poor, beautiful woman, Vivek.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (45:14)

Was

 

there age power play in this? How old was

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (45:16)

Oh god yeah.

 

She would have been, she would have been 25 and he would have been 50.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (45:25)

So it’s exactly where we started the conversation.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (45:29)

Yes, exactly.

 

And it was that day that I went into town, into Pune, and I bought my ticket home and I left the cult and I changed my name back to Martina. Yeah, from India. And that was it. I never looked back.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (45:49)

How will?

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (45:49)

Yeah,

 

that was, I was 27. So I was a Rajneji from 19 to 27. It’s a long time.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (46:00)

No wonder you had to write a memoir, Martina, because there is a lot of lived experience to put down, but it’s the same thread. It’s the same repetitive thread just in different settings. mean, it’s movie worthy. It’s extraordinary.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (46:24)

Yes, yeah if anyone wants to know more about the cult there’s a really good Netflix series called Wild Wild Country and it’s really worth watching because it’s about the ashram in Oregon the $64,000, $64,000 acre ashram. yeah it’s worth watching.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (46:43)

Yeah. Yeah, right.

 

Say that title again for us.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (46:50)

Wild, wild country. W-I-L-D, yeah, wild, wild country. It’s actually not completely, ⁓ it’s still the people that they interview ⁓ are all people that still love the Guru. So it’s skewed towards.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (47:13)

So is it documentary?

 

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (47:16)

It’s a documentary which has some propaganda but you can also see through it. Yeah, but the Rajneeshis, their interview are still Rajneeshis. I wish they had also interviewed… No, he passed away. He passed away. They don’t know. They said, I think they said heart failure but some people say he also… ⁓

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (47:22)

Okay.

 

He’s no longer with us.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (47:46)

⁓ He chose euthanasia and that his doctor gave him a lethal injection. But I don’t know.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (47:57)

So without going into detail, there’s often solidarity in ⁓ women in marginalised or high risk environments, which is what I suspect you found in the sex work. Absolutely. again, in the cult. Very much so.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (48:18)

Yes,

 

it’s a absolutely.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (48:21)

call it a cult. What

 

from your personal and professional experience matters so much about this camaraderie that you find in these most extraordinary settings?

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (48:36)

Yes, I mean the women at the brothel, were beautiful to me. They were just lovely because I was younger than them and they were much more experienced at their work than I was. They took me under their wing and I loved being around them. They were very funny. They they looked out for each other. They looked out for me. I looked out for them as well.

 

And I’ve always loved women ⁓ and felt very comfortable with women. I just felt very at home with them and cared for. If I had a bad client, they would always debrief with me afterwards and care for me. ⁓ So that was really important. At the ashram, I had…

 

really good, I made really good friends on the pipe crew. We were a gang of people who had a lot of fun together.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (49:42)

It

 

just, I can’t get my head around it on a gang on the pipe crew. It’s like chain gang stuff. It’s bizarre. Just bizarre. all jokes aside, this ⁓ choice of women to support women in these extraordinary settings is incredibly powerful. And something that

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (49:52)

Yes.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (50:11)

you know, I harp on about in Power of Women. It’s not always found and you found it in extraordinary settings to be plentiful.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (50:24)

Yes, absolutely. And I already had found it as a girl, as a child. found, because my own mother had a mental illness and was very suicidal and absent because she had been abused by the same two men, her father and her brother. So she was not a good mum. She was very troubled. This was generational.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (50:27)

Yeah.

 

Yeah.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (50:52)

 

I found very early on, I found girlfriends whose mothers took me under their wing. I would visit them, I would hang out there, I would stay weekends. I would be away from home as much as possible and those mothers and girls really loved me. I think I was a lovable kid. Thank God I was a lovable kid. And so I did always have loving women who

 

I think they sensed that things were not okay at home. And even though I hid it and would never talk about it, and they cared for me, which is very fortunate. And funny enough, I’ve done the same thing with my daughter. I’ve cared for her girlfriends ⁓ who also some of them have had difficult childhoods.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (51:47)

Yeah, there’s the positive aspect of that you have traveled. So at what point do you see women moving from surviving their past to authoring their future? Is there a profound point on the continuum that that happens?

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (51:51)

Absolutely.

 

think it doesn’t happen straight away which is really hard because you want that healing so desperately once you embark on the path of healing, once you start therapy or once you disclose it to your best friend and yet it takes, I think it takes at least a couple of years to find some strength, some power and strength to ⁓ believe in yourself, to let go of the shame.

 

and to have a voice. And that is a long time to wait. I remember I used to say to my beautiful therapist, you know, how much longer until I feel better? And it took, I think it took a couple of years. Yes, yes. And I was very committed. And I think, you know, some other people, some other women can’t be committed because they don’t have the money to go to therapy. Or they have

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (52:57)

It’s a string.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (53:11)

four kids at home and they don’t have the time to go to therapy or they don’t have a car to get there.

 

Yeah, so it takes time and patience. And money, absolutely.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (53:23)

and money.

 

Yeah. Wow! Is your book on the shelves already?

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (53:32)

Yes it is, it came out in September last year and it’s on the shelves and it’s also available on Amazon and on Kindle.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (53:41)

Yeah, what a read. What a read. Could you just, the title is…

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (53:46)

Not My Shame. Not My Shame. that is, I chose that title because at the time Giselle Pellicot in France was talking about, with her court case, she was talking about shame must change sides. And that’s why I chose that title, yes.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (54:11)

What a profound point in time to bring it up, because that was one of the most terrific cases anywhere in the world that any of us could ever have heard about.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (54:23)

and yet what a strong woman she is.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (54:25)

Absolutely. And I’m assuming listeners know the story we’re talking about, but it was the woman who was repeatedly abused by strangers ⁓ for years as a result of her husband drugging her and running it as an enterprise. just one of the darkest examples of a perpetrator one could ever even imagine. So yeah.

 

I’m going to close with a couple of rapid fire questions today, Martina.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (55:01)

Okay.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (55:02)

what something survivors are really told but should be.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (55:09)

The most important thing is for a survivor to hear is, I believe you. And also, secondly, it’s not your fault. It’s the perpetrator’s fault. They’re very powerful statements.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (55:24)

Very powerful, they give me goosebumps listening to you say them just now. What’s one assumption about trauma that does more harm than good?

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (55:36)

that you can never heal, that you’ll always be damaged. And we can heal and we will have relief from the damage of abuse.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (55:49)

Yep, great affirmation. If a woman listening right now is still blaming herself, what do want her to hear?

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (55:58)

I want her to hear that it is not her fault and that there is help available and maybe we can put some things in the show notes. There is help available, there is actually free help available for those who don’t, who can’t afford therapy ⁓ and they don’t have to walk this path alone.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (56:23)

Absolutely. Martina, thank you so much for what is just the most extraordinary conversation today about your own personal experience and the incredibly informative information that you’ve shared for somebody who has been through this horrendous trauma of sexual abuse and in particular child sexual abuse and how to…

 

⁓ approach that as part of a journey of healing and shifting that shame from oneself to perpetrator. And to your point, absolutely, I will ask you to share with me some links that we can put into the show notes for our listeners. ⁓ And that then becomes something powerful that they can also pass on and share the episode with somebody that

 

they believe really does need to listen to a conversation such as the one that we’ve had today. as unfortunate as it is, there are plenty of victims out there who are yet to face into the healing journey, I suspect. And hopefully this goes some way to…

 

identifying a roadmap for somebody to pursue to start that path.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (57:54)

Fantastic. Thank you so much for your time, and for the opportunity to have a chat with you.

 

DI GILLETT [HOST] (58:02)

my absolute privilege. Thank you, Martina. Until next time.

 

DR MARTINA ZANGGER [GUEST] (58:06)

Thank you, Di.

Chapters:

00:00 Rage and Hope: The Duality of Healing

01:53 Childhood Trauma: A Hidden Reality

05:57 The Journey to Disclosure

09:46 The Importance of Safe Spaces

14:02 Shame: The Silent Burden

18:13 Confronting the Past

21:58 Understanding Perpetrators

25:58 The Role of Women in Healing

30:04 The Rajneesh Cult Experience

38:02 Breaking Free from the Cult

46:00 Empowerment Through Storytelling

 

Connect with Di:

Connect with Di on LinkedIn

Follow Power Of Women on LinkedIn

Follow Di on Instagram

The Power Of Women Podcast Instagram

Contact Di

 

Find Martina at:

Website https://martinazangger.com.au/

LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/dr-martina-zangger-9b29874a/

Instagram https://www.instagram.com/martinazangger/

 

Resources [Australia]:

Free Services for victim-survivors:

https://victimsservices.justice.nsw.gov.au (22 free counselling sessions for victims of crime NSW)

1800RESPECT: 1800 737 732 (free DV and SA counselling 24 hours)

https://www.thesurvivorhub.org.au (free monthly peer support group)

https://bravehearts.org.au (Bravehearts: Free counselling for victims of CSA)

 

This is the home of unapologetic conversations and powerful stories of reinvention. New episodes drop every Monday to fuel your week with insights on leadership, resilience, and success. Subscribe and join a community of women who are changing the game.

 

Want more fearless, unfiltered stories?

 

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📩 Sign up for our newsletter where I share raw reflections and thought leadership on the Power Of Reinvention.

 

Disclaimer:  https://powerofwomen.com.au/podcast-disclaimer/

40 Years in Modelling… and Fully Employed at 57

40 Years in Modelling… and Fully Employed at 57

In this episode, Kate Bell reflects on a 40-year modelling career that defies conventional timelines. Modelling is one of the toughest industries in the world and at 57, Kate is still fully employed.

She speaks openly about ageism, rejection, women’s self-perception, and the practices that sustained her – from yoga and writing to self-discipline and creative expression.

Rather than positioning reinvention as a single turning point, Kate describes a career built on constant adaptation and responsibility for how she responds to life and work.

 

➡️You’ll Hear :

How rejection shaped Kate’s professional detachment and resilience

Why mature women are still underrepresented in fashion

The role of creativity as a lifelong stabiliser

What staying relevant actually requires

 

Kate said:

“Modelling is a job where you’re constantly and consistently wrong and rejected.”

“I’m healthier, happier, and more alive at 57 than I’ve ever been.”

“For real equality to happen, women must work together. Together we rise.”

Chapters:

00:00 The Journey of Self-Discovery and Connection

02:55 The Glamorous Yet Tough World of Modelling

05:56 Facing Industry Realities: Bullying and Racism

09:06 Reinvention and Self-Kindness

11:55 The Power of Intuition and Personal Growth

15:07 Creativity as an Anchor in Life

21:08 Resilience in the Face of Rejection

26:25 The Nature of Rejection in Modelling

35:05 Women’s Self-Perception and Aging

45:07 Empowerment and Support Among Women

 

Connect with Di:

Connect with Di on LinkedIn

Follow Power Of Women on LinkedIn

Follow Di on Instagram

The Power Of Women Podcast Instagram

Contact Di

 

Find Kate Bell at:

Instagram  https://www.instagram.com/i_am_katebell/

Substack https://katebell.substack.com/?r=vl8lb&utm_medium=ios&utm_source=profile&utm_content=link_in_bio&fbclid=PAZXh0bgNhZW0CMTEAc3J0YwZhcHBfaWQMMjU2MjgxMDQwNTU4AAGn64pbkZE-s9uwUSetIa6JvlFQgH1zXycTZNUvbFT0wq_Y8VirwV4vpmKIZAU_aem_vjgIJmSrXCBU5tGgeYRE_g

 

This is the home of unapologetic conversations and powerful stories of reinvention. New episodes drop every Monday to fuel your week with insights on leadership, resilience, and success. Subscribe and join a community of women who are changing the game.

Want more fearless, unfiltered stories?

 

💫 Subscribe to the Power Of Women Podcast on YouTube, Spotify, or Apple Podcasts

Your ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐star review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify keeps these stories alive.

 

📩 Sign up for our newsletter where I share raw reflections and thought leadership on the Power Of Reinvention.

 

Disclaimer:  https://powerofwomen.com.au/podcast-disclaimer/